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May 2015

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Celebutard News – May 1, 2015

Reese Witherspoon’s Beautiful Daughter Ava Looks Just Like Her Mother Like two gorgeous peas in a pod! Read Story Jonah Hill is now the whale of Wall Street Jonah Hill’s weight continues to fluctuate. Read Story ‘Neverland’ ‘revokes’ Tony voters’ free tickets after snub Is it war between Harvey Weinstein and Broadway? Read Story Courtney Stodden offered $1M for sex…

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Boner Candidates for May 1, 2015

Boner Candidate #1: JUST THROW SOME GRAVY ON IT Image By Alpha The Hawkins County School District in East Tennessee has reportedly launched a new district-wide meat inspection program after apparently serving six-year-old pork to their students. “It’s not clear,” WATE reports, “if it was tainted.” Michael Herrell, a parent and Hawkins County, Tenn. commissioner, alerted school district officials to the…

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Pic courtesy of Bryan Ward

Because I Keep Getting Asked – Avengers: Age of Ultron

You may have heard this movie is ‘bloated’. I think that’s a harsh description. Yes, there is A LOT happening on the screen and in the story…but Joss Weadon handled all these elements just fine. All the characters get their moments to shine and develop. Joss doesnt wait for you to catch up, we hit the ground running and the…

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Harmon’s Mother’s Day Giveaway

Let Harmons help you make Mother’s Day extra-special this year. Tell us the best meal that your mom ever made—and you’ll be entered to win a Harmons Mother’s Day prize package (valued at $100) and a cooking class for two from X96 and Harmons.

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Boner Candidates for May 4, 2015

Boner Candidate #1: THE HOT MIC PEE Image By Sean In a (presumably unintentional) tribute to HBO’s The Jinx, a city councilman in Georgetown, Texas recently took a bathroom break while wearing a live microphone. Unlike Jinx star Robert Durst, however, the councilman did not seemingly confess to several murders and just peed instead, to the obvious delight of the city’s…

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Geek News – May 4, 2015

STAR WARS: THE FORCE AWAKENS PRODUCTS TO ARRIVE ON ‘FORCE FRIDAY,’ SEPTEMBER 4 The next generation of Star Wars toys, collectibles, books, and apparel is in range. Read Story Inside a ‘Star Wars’ Firing: ‘Fantastic Four’ Problems Led to Director Josh Trank’s Ouster While director Josh Trank said Friday that he had “made a personal decision” to leave the Star…

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Just Say No To Prom

  This is my first prom photo. With my first boyfriend Vince…he was also my first kiss, which apparently I was terrible at because that’s what he told my mom. True Story. Just say no to prom now so that several years from now your first boyfriend doesn’t post an embarrasing photo of you on Throwback Thursday.  You’re welcome.  …

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An Open Letter Regarding The X96 Short Bus

Recently, there has been some concern from a few individuals regarding the X96 promotional vehicle known as the X96 Short Bus. We have been told that we are somehow being insensitive and that we are allegedly mocking families and individuals with disabilities. It has been implied, through these social media posts, that we don’t know what it is like to…

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Time Wasters at Work May 5th

1. Want your own JARVIS? conquer.today/turn-google-chrome-jarvis-iron-man 2. Greatest twist endings in movies http://www.ranker.com/list/best-movies-with-twist-endings/anncasano?var=2&utm_expid=16418821-98.mZzE1CJ2QUSlmjhPjOznAQ.1 Bonus! Most powerful characters in comics http://www.ranker.com/list/most-powerful-comic-book-characters-ranked/ranker-comics 3. Have too much money? Buy an electric kazoo http://www.askmen.com/entertainment/guy_gear/discoveries-of-the-week-star-wars-shirts-electric-kazoos-and-safety-in-the-city.html 4. Scientific explantions for weird behaviors http://listverse.com/2015/05/03/10-scientific-explanations-for-our-weird-behaviors/ 5. Save your video game money for next month. Ride and NASCAR 15 are your best releases this month.

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Celebutard News – May 5, 2015

Martha Stewart: ‘My mom taught me everything’ Mother’s Day’s coming. Mother’s little helper Martha Stewart remembered her mom: “Martha Ruszkowski Kostyra. Born 1914. Polish. We called her Big Martha. Read Story ‘Montage Of Heck’ Director Brett Morgen Says Kurt Cobain’s Mother Was ‘Furious’ When She Saw The Film Director Brett Morgen’s “Montage of Heck” is winning rave reviews for its…

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Boner Candidates for Tuesday, May 5 2015

Boner Candidate #1: WELL, THEY ARE LEARNING FIRST-HAND ABOUT CHLAMYDIA Image By Danny Howard  If you attend Texas’ Crane High School, there’s about a one in fifteen chance that you have chlamydia right now. Fun, unrelated fact: you’ve also never been enrolled in a comprehensive sex-ed course. Weird! The parents of the students who should have known better than to do…

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X96 Live and Local Spotlight: The Statuettes

The X96 Live and Local Spotlight band for May 2015 is The Statuettes. They have been a band since 2008, originally starting our with one member: Michael Gross. Eventually, they evolved into Michael Gross and the Statuettes adding Jimmy Kelly (guitar, keys), Ben Johnson (bass, keys), and Todd Hammond on drums. Mr. Gross sings and play guitars. Michael was a member…

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