Boners

Boner Candidates for January 20th, 2017

BONER CANDIDATE#1: YOU WANT THEM TO SETTLE DOWN? SIMPLE…TAPE ‘EM TO THE WALL.

A mother in Ohio who livestreamed taping her toddler to the wall — and later taunted child welfare officials by saying they could come “take him” — has been arrested and charged with felony abduction, police said. Shayla Rudolph, 18, was arrested Thursday after detectives from the Reynoldsburg Police Department got a tip from WSYX in Columbus that she used clear packing tape to restrain her 2-year-old son against the wall. Rudolph also taped the boy’s mouth shut and he apparently was restrained for about 15 minutes, police said. Rudolph was charged with third-degree felony abduction. Her son was taken into custody by Franklin County Children’s Services, police confirmed to The Post. Rudolph, during the Facebook Live video she posted a few weeks ago, is seen standing in front of the boy, who is crying loudly. She then turns to him and says, “You got the best mommy in the whole wide world.” Rudolph, according to WSYX, then explains her rationale for the punishment, speaking directly to the camera: “You can’t clean without them running around tearing up? Tape ‘em to the wall. You can’t cook or none of that because they running around? Tape ‘em to the wall.” Rudolph also threatens to put more tape on the boy, telling him to “sit still” as he is covered in packaging tape. “You can see the TV from right there,” she says. “You be all right.” Officials from the Franklin County Children’s Services visited Rudolph’s home Jan. 5 regarding the video, which she claimed was a joke, WSYX reports.

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BONER CANDIDATE#2: THE LIGHT SABER WASN’T MUCH HELP

Two crooks put their hand over a 9-year-old boy’s mouth at a Brooklyn Target store before swiping a wad of cash from his pocket last week, cops said on Thursday. The young victim was shopping in the Target at the Atlantic Terminal Mall on Flatbush Avenue on Jan. 10 around 5:30 p.m., holding what looked to be a toy light-saber, when surveillance video shows him attempting to pick up an item that fell off a shelf. One of the thieves approached him and helped place the item back on the shelf before another man approached and both started chatting with the boy. The video then shows both men going down an elevator with the boy, and cops say they convinced him to go with them to an unspecified location. Outside the Target, one of the suspects placed his hand over the boy’s mouth while the other swiped $282 from his pocket, according to police. Cops say the boy was not injured.

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BONER CANDIDATE#3: CAN YOU SAY CREEPY?

A British mom is on the defensive after trotting out her daughter for a performance some critics are ripping as “creepy.” Little 7-year-old Xia Vigoa has become an international sensation with her imitation of Taylor Swift and her song “You Belong With Me,” on the Filipino talent show “Your Face Sounds Familiar Kids.” Instant rave reviews have since turned to concern that Xia’s red-lip-stick-pouting, one-shoulder- sequin-dress performance might have been a little too much for a little girl. “As a mother I would not put my child in a position where she would be sexualized… [the programme] is for children,” mom Christy Bernardo told “This Morning” television show Thursday on Great Britain’s ITV. But high-profile critics of the girl’s act have been led by TV pundit Piers Morgan, who has called it “creepy” and “sexualized.”  The mom defended her daughter, calling Morgan “very judgmental” and unfair. “He should know his facts first,” she said. “I thought he’d be more intelligent than that,” she said, the Sun reported. Xia’s performance has become a viral sensation with more than 4.7 million views on the show’s YouTube since Sunday. In the song, Xia comes out in a drum major uniform – a look Swift has used on the concert stage. A team of dancers dressed as cheerleaders then rip off that uniform to reveal Xia dressed in a sparkling, one-shoulder dress. “She’s an extremely smart girl, she’s not a normal 7-year-old,” the girl’s mom said. “She loves to perform.” Xia, who is from Exeter, Devon – is also known for her impersonation of Selena Gomez. Her rendition of “Love You Like a Love Song” has picked up more than 1.8 million views since it was first posted on the “Your Face” YouTube page on Jan. 7

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