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Boner Candidates for March 31, 2015

Boner Candidate #1: THE WORLDS LAZIEST DOG OWNER

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Image By Mateusz Juszczak

Lazy has a new benchmark. The new level is being so idle you can’t even be bothered to step out of your car and walk your dog like this driver. A video showed the pet owner holding their dog’s leash through the window, while the mutt struggled to keep up as they accelerated. The display of extreme laziness irritated Vimeo users, with one of them seeking criminal charges for the driver. And it wasn’t for their slothfulness. They actually found the stunt dangerous (which it was).

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Boner Candidate #2: CHURCH SHOULD BE LAW

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Image By Roo Reynolds

This week, Arizona State Senator Sylvia Allen caused a stir with statements she made during a debate over a bill to allow individuals to carry concealed firearms into public buildings. Allen strayed from the topic at hand, just a little. CBS 5 reports on Allen’s comments:

Allen explained that without a “moral rebirth” in the country, more people may feel the need to carry a weapon. “I believe what’s happening to our country is that there’s a moral erosion of the soul of America,” she said. “It’s the soul that is corrupt. How we get back to a moral rebirth I don’t know. Since we are slowly eroding religion at every opportunity that we have. Probably we should be debating a bill requiring every American to attend a church of their choice on Sunday to see if we can get back to having a moral rebirth,” she told the committee.

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Boner Candidate #3: WE SAID SORRY

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Image By Bart Everson

Glenn Ford was imprisoned for nearly half his life for a murder he didn’t commit. Now, the 65-year-old has been denied restitution for his nearly 30 years on Louisiana’s death row. Caddo Parish District Judge Katherine Dorroh on Friday denied Ford compensation, saying that while Ford did not commit the murder that led to his wrongful imprisonment, he was “proven to be guilty of lesser crimes and was not an innocent man.” The judge said Ford knew about plans for the robbery that led to the killing and didn’t stop it. Further, he attempted to destroy evidence by pawning items taken in the robbery and tried to find buyers for the murder weapon used by men Ford implicated in the murder. “While Mr. Ford does not have the blood of Isadore Rozeman on his hands, he did not have clean hands,” Dorroh wrote in her nine-page order. Ford’s attorney, Gary Clements, said the court’s conclusion is akin to denying compensation for “jaywalking in front of the house where a crime happened.” “Truth is, if you pawned jewelry, you would never spend 30 years on death row,” Clements told The Huffington Post Monday.

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Feature Image By static416

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