Boners

Boner Candidates November 6th, 2015

Boner Candidate #1: THE FAT SHAMING PHOTO TAKING NURSE.

Sydney school teacher Breanna (not her real name) checked into a private hospital for routine gynaecological surgery late last year and a few days later, the surgeon rang with the good news that she did not have cancer. But the doctor from Norwest Private Hospital in Sydney’s north-west had another bombshell. She told Breanna one of the nurses had taken an explicit photo of her while she was under anaesthetic. “I felt like my world was exploding. I felt I was in great peril that this photo was going to destroy my life, my career and that my son would find out,” she said. But what has made her really angry is that there is little she can do to stop it happening to others. What has made Breanna really angry is that there is little she can do to stop it happening to others. In New South Wales, there is no law protecting patients from having similar photos taken. “I am an information technology teacher. I know how bad it could get and that the photo could have ended up on the internet and being shared,” she told the ABC. “The photo was explicit and left nothing to the imagination.”

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Boner Candidate #2: HOW DO YOU SAY “SO LONG” IN KOREAN?

She thought she had met the man of her dreams: a clean-cut, square-jawed US Army sergeant from New York who donned a traditional South Korean tunic for their flower-bedecked wedding. Instead, Rachel Lee, 43, of Uijeongbu, near Seoul, has been left with a nullified marriage, $50,000 in credit-card debt and a broken heart — because her “husband,” Army Master Sgt. Scott Fuller, 40, already had a wife and two kids living in Rockland County. Fuller is now back in that New City home with his original wife, Marianne, and their daughter, 6, and son, 4. And Lee, a teacher, remains a half a world away, devastated. “It has been very, very tough for me,” she told The Post Thursday in a phone call from South Korea. “Quite honestly, I do feel suicidal,” she said through a translator. Lee and Fuller started dating in August 2013 and were married just four months later.

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Boner Candidate #3: CANCER. THAT’S AN EASY FIX.

Nevada Assemblywoman Michele Fiore said recently that she will propose a “Right to Try” bill in her state. But it’s not the bill itself that gained national attention. Instead, it was Fiore’s statement that she believes cancer is “a fungus” that can be cured by “flushing, let’s say, saltwater, sodium carbonate” through the body. Just to be clear, right up front: Cancer is not a fungus. It is the uncontrolled division of abnormal human cells within the body. Saltwater cannot cure cancer. But the idea that something as simple and clean as water mixed with sodium carbonate (or more often, the theory goes, sodium bicarbonate or baking soda) persists, as Fiore’s statement indicates. The American Cancer Society has a lengthy post on its Web site debunking the idea.

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