Boners

Boner Preview Candidates for November 11 2015

Boner Preview Candidate #1: YOU AIN’T SUPOSTA DO THIS NO MORE?

Country star Jason Aldean—47th on Forbes’ highest-paid celebrities list—went out in blackface and dreadlocks for Halloween, Nashville Gab reports.

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Boner Preview Candidate #2: IT WORKS FOR MY HUSBAND

An Arkansas mom picked up the old whiskey-on-the-gums trick from her own mother, as you do, but she allegedly went overboard and fed her 10-month-old son some of the bourbon she kept in the freezer.

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Boner Preview Candidate #3: HOW DO THESE THINGS HAPPEN?

Oh hey, Christmas is here. First Starbucks forgot that Jesus is the reason for the season and now Bloomingdale’s is encouraging you to date rape your friend.

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Boner Preview Candidate #4: WHAT A TURD

A Brooklyn man was arrested at a Sandy Hook massacre charity event in Connecticut for accosting a victim’s family — and yelling that the shooting was a hoax, cops said on Tuesday.

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Boner Preview Candidate #5: Kevin Swanson: God Will Judge America For Harry Potter’s ‘Homosexual Mentor’

Colorado pastor Kevin Swanson closed out his National Religious Liberties Conference today — following speeches yesterday by Republican presidential candidates Ted Cruz, Mike Huckabee and Bobby Jindal — with an extended rant about the many reasons why America needs to repent in order to avoid God’s judgment, including legal abortion, birth control, immoral themes in country music and gay characters in “Harry Potter” and “How to Train Your Dragon.”

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Boner Preview Candidate #6: COULDN’T YOU KEEP YOUR KNEES TOGETHER EH?

Federal Court judge under review for berating sex assault complainant

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