My Uniform

Friday, February 29th, 2008 @ 12:30PM

What else does a man need to wear?

I think I need to start wearing a uniform; pretty much the same thing every day.  Why waste time thinking about what to put on your body?  I’m doing to go with jeans (button-fly 501’s for the most part) and a black T-shirt...year round too.  I’ll wear the long sleeve black T in the winter and the short sleeve in the summer.  No logos, just a plain black T.  I think I look good in that combo and it will free me from the necessity of even having to look in the mirror. 

If it’s good enough for Lou Reed, it’s more than good enough for me.

Thanks for listening,

Bill

The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee

Wednesday, February 27th, 2008 @ 11:53AM

I am no how 2 spel gud.

I had a great time last night as a celebrity speller in this show at Kingsbury Hall at the University of Utah.  It plays through Sunday and it’s a very entertaining evening of theatre.  Go, go, go.  Get your tickets at http://www.kingtix.com or call 681.7100.

I was on stage with the professional actors and three other audience members.  The whole thing was designed to keep me on stage for as long as possible.  The moderators gave me two pretty easy words to spell.  Then, I got a very difficult word that I’d never even heard before.  I tried my best to spell it phonetically and, the moderators on stage and the rest of the cast seemed to be shocked.  I actually spelled the word “CATTERJUENES” correctly.  I blew them away with my spelling prowess and I blew the audience away.  Everyone bought it including me.  The next word I was asked to spell was even harder and I was not given a chance to spell it.  As I began, they rang the bell on me and said wrong....thanks for playing....and escorted me off stage.  My part was done for the evening.  But, I thought, wow...Bill...you were a great speller. 

But after some thought, and a few words with my son who’d seen the show in New York, I began to realize that the hard word I’d seemed to spell correctly was all a set up.  As far as I can tell, it’s not even a word.  I believed and so did the audience.  Ah, the magic of theatre.

Some of my favorite moments were hearing people talk about me when they didn’t know I was standing near.  My wife heard someone say, “boy Bill Allred sure isn’t very impressive when you see him.  I wasn’t expecting him to be so short.:” And as I was leaving the theatre I overheard a guy say to his wife, “I"ve never really cared for Bill Allred.”

Anyway, thanks to everyone who came to see the ‘Spelling Bee’ last night.  When I left the stage, they gave me a juice box to say thank-you.

P.S. If you go tonight when Doug Wright from KSL is the celebrity speller please contact me and tell me how he does.

Thanks for listening,
Bill

The Academy Awards

Tuesday, February 26th, 2008 @ 12:16PM

And the Oscar goes to.....

I think I’m in the minority, but I was pretty well satisfied with the 80th Annual Academy Awards show Sunday night.  It was a low key awards show, but I thought that was okay.  I liked the winners and I didn’t pay any attention to the losers.  John Stewart was good (Gaydolph Titler was the best line of the night) and most of the people who deserved to win, did. 

I was just a little disturbed by Daniel Day Lewis.  Did anyone else here that weird little laughing, humming noise he made several times when he was pausing for applause during his acceptance speech?  Maybe I was just tired. 

I’ve said in the past that I wouldn’t watch the Oscar ceremony because it keeps me up too late and I have to work the next morning but I’m changing my mind on this score.  I’ll watch the Oscars and then be there the next morning for all of you friends of the program.  I’m happy to watch rich Hollywood stars for you.

Thanks for listening,
Bill

Where Did All The DJ’s Go?

Friday, February 22nd, 2008 @ 12:12PM

Wolfman Jack was probably the world's most famous DJ at one time.

Now, it's probably Howard Stern. But what about all those DJ's you grew up with locally? What happened to Uncle Nasty and Straight Arrow? Where is Skinny Johnny Mitchell? Where is Jordan Mitchell? Who knows what became of Evan Lake, the Water Man? Has anybody seen the Red Rocker around? Scott McCormick anyone? Wasn't there a Shotgun Kelly in this market? Ugly Jerry...he was here and he was ugly but is he still alive? And there was a Mrs. Ugly too. Someone emailed me about Hans Peterson today. I know Tony Butler is still out there somewhere. I spoke with Michael G. Kavanaugh the other day in person. Gary Zane. Scott Gentry. Scott Christopher.

Some of you may remember a DJ from quite along time ago named Ray Kalusa. I got word the other day that Ray had died of a heart attack. And then, a few days ago, I was at a Megaplex Theatre and one of those home produced movie trivia things was on before the feature. It was hosted by Ray Kalusa. Back from the dead? No, I don't think so. Just an old piece of production.

Where do all the old (and not so old) DJ's go? The radio business gets done with a lot of them before they're ready to be done. But radio doesn't care. It just throws them away anyway.

We were talking about this on the RFH show Friday and maybe it's something we can pursue. Are there any DJ's that you want to know about or any that you can share some info on? We don't need to know about the Wolfman or Howard. We know one is dead and the other makes millions on the satellite. Sometimes we just get curious about all the little guys.

Thanks for listening,
Bill

I Been Hip-No-Tize!

Thursday, February 21st, 2008 @ 12:12PM

Vincent Lords made me his hypno-bitch.

I don’t know folks.  Vincent took me into the other room and made me very relaxed.  I felt a little groggy when he was done.  (It took about 10 minutes) And then I felt energetic and rested.  Could he have made me cluck like a chicken?  I don’t think so, but maybe.  He is a very persuasive man.  I’m still open minded.  I’d like to know your hypnosis stories.

Thanks for listening,

Bill

Bill Goes To Pleasant Grove

Tuesday, February 19th, 2008 @ 11:43AM

I did not find the "grove" so I cannot attest to how "pleasant" it is.

But Pleasant Grove seemed like a very nice town.  I was there this Saturday past for a remote at the Crystal Ray.  Nice folks one and all there.  Then, FOP Richard Clark took me on a fast tour of the sights and sounds and smells of PG. 

Pleasant Grove used to be a fort of some kind and this is one of the cornerstones.

A place for toiletries and drugs.

Need a drink and a quick game of 8 ball?

For real entertainment, everyone goes here.

Cavities are no problem in Pleasant Grove.

We end the day with halibut and chips and a strawberry milkshake.

Pleasant Grove; a great place to raise up your kids in.  Thanks Richard Clark for the tour and his friend on the motorcycle who brought the camera.

Thanks for listening,
Bill

Immigration

Monday, February 18th, 2008 @ 8:08AM

Are you afraid they'll take our jobs and marry our women?

I do commentary on the KUED television show Utah Now.
It’s on channel 7.  This past week there was a great discussion of immigration legislation . You can watch it here. http://kued.org/productions/utahnow/?action=viewShowD Let me know what you think.

Thanks for listening,
Bill

Trying To Get In Shape

Wednesday, February 13th, 2008 @ 11:37AM

Hauling my fat butt up a wall.

The local climbing gym is a fascinating place.  Men, women, boys and girls roped up and climbing up these walls and then rappelling down from the ceiling like so many spiders on webs.  Everybody seems to be in really good shape...way better shape than me.  And these people work out hard too.  There was a guy there last night doing pull-ups and dips.  Just pulling up his own body weight wasn’t enough for this fellow.  He held a 10 pound plus barbell with his feet crossed and pulled that up too.  Everybody is in great shape at the climbing gym.

But, I’m having fun with it and every time I go, I get a little better.  How many places are there to climb like this in the valley?  Which ones are best?  Let me know if you know of places to go.

PS...none of the people in the photo above is me.  They’re all too slim and good looking.

Thanks for listening,
Bill

Who Else Wants a Taste?

Monday, February 11th, 2008 @ 12:26PM

It tastes so bad it must be good for you.

I’ve started drinking this stuff and I think it must be good for me.  It’s kombucha and it’s some kind of fungus, I think.  A few years ago someone I worked with (I think it was you KY if you are still in touch with our website and reading this blog) gave me a “start” of this weird mushroom, fungus thing.  She said to take it home and let it grow in the dark and then brew it up into a daily tea.  She claimed I’d lose weight and become healthier and have more sex than I knew what to do with and make a million dollars and get better looking and.....more, if only I’d drink the tea. 

Well, I took the thing home, put it in the basement and forgot about it.  It grew and grew.  It climbed out of the pan and started to spread up the walls before we found, and killed it.  That was the last time I had any experience with kombucha until this past week-end.

Some friends from Seattle are in town and fetched out a bottle of this pre-made kombuch stuff you see in the picture above.  They drink it all the time and love it.  I’m not sure whether they love the taste or the benefits but the love it.  I tried it and it tastes pretty vile to me but not so bad that I can’t drink it.  I think of it as a medicine.  Little Bill, my boy, claims he likes the flavor.  He wants more.  Well, I’m going to drink it for a while but I know many of you have already had experience with kombucha and can further my learning curve. 

Let me just say, I probably don’t want to grow my own at home, so other than that, what advice do you all have for me?

Let’s make contact about kombucha.

Thanks for listening
Bill

My other job

Friday, February 8th, 2008 @ 11:44AM

"Any clod can have the facts, but having an opinion is an art."

I’m a lucky guy.  I’m now the semi-permanent editorialist on KUED Channel 7’s Utah Now program.  It’s on Friday nights at 8:30pm and I’d really like you to see it and comment on it.  I really do want feed-back on what I say and how I say it.  The segment is called “350 Words or Less.” I like doing it and they even pay me a little bit of money, though that’s not the point because I would do it for free.  Anyway, here’s a link to their web site http://www.kued.org/productions/utahnow// and I’d like you to respond there and to me here at X-96.

Thanks for listening,
Bill

Local Book Stores

Wednesday, February 6th, 2008 @ 11:24AM

Go to these places whenever possible.

Shop locally.  “Where are the local bookstores,?” a friend of the RFH Show inquired.  Well, here are three of them.  Each is distinctive, well stocked, and fun to browse. 

There aren’t many people more interesting to talk to than Ken Sanders.  Ken has been finding interesting books for us to read since the days of the old Cosmic Aeroplane.  Ask him anything and he’ll find you some books on his shelves that relate to your topic.

Tony Weller carries on the tradition of his father Sam at Weller’s Zion Bookstore.  If Tony doesn’t have a particular book then you don ‘t really need to read it.

Then King’s English will order anything you want and they have an excellent selection of children’s books too.

There are other local books shops.  These are just three that I go to.  There all in town.  If you want to know where, look them up.

Thanks for listening,

Bill

SuperBowl Halftime Show

Monday, February 4th, 2008 @ 11:22AM

It looks like a phallus to me.

Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers.  What a daring halftime show for yesterday’s superbowl.  We’ll go with the safe choice.  But even at that, a giant phallus made it’s way across the stadium at the beginning of the Tom Petty set.  I’ve included the pictures here but go and watch a video of it.  There’s sure to be one on U Tube. 

And speaking of Tom Petty; don’t you think that beard is a great choice for him?  Good lookin’. 

I’m not always into the superbowl but I watched this one and rooted for the New York Football Giants.  I thought it was a great game.

Thanks for listening,
Bill

High School Reunions

Friday, February 1st, 2008 @ 2:59PM

Frank Zappa

I don't care how cool you were, graduation made you un-cool.

Captain Beefheart

I"m not saying you shouldn’t graduate from high school. Of course you should.  But it doesn’t make you cool.  Frank Zappa and Captain Beefheart were two of the coolest guys ever, I think. Both graduated from high school.  But look at their pictures.  They don’t look cool. 

And then, high school reunions.  If you go to them, don’t you revert to the un-cool person you were on graduation day?  I don’t want to be reminded of what a loser I was in high school, because I was.  Everyone thought I was a loser and I was sure they were right.  It’s taken me years to find my self confidence after the horror of high school. 

But, perhaps I should tough it out and see just how strong I’ve become, if I have. and face the demons of the past at my high school reunion.  I haven’t decided.  Help me think about it.  I’m open to your suggestions. 

By the way, a great Frank Zappa record for you to listen to is Hot Rats.  A great Captain Beefheart record is Doc at the Radar Station.  Let me know what your think about the music or about the reunion.

Thanks for listening,
Bill