Boners

Boner Candidate Preview August 31, 2016

Boner Preview #1: MAKIN A BUCK OFF HARAMBE

An idiotic KickStarter campaign made a goal to start making shot glasses that have a label on the side saying, “take a shot for Harambe, he took one for you.” Check out the official web-page of the KickStarter below.

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Boner Preview #2: WELCOME FEMALE TOURISTS! WELCOME TO INDIA.

Mahesh Sharma, India’s culture minister, said this week that foreign women should not wear skirts while visiting the country, drawing broad criticism in a nation trying to assure female tourists they do not need to fear sexual assault.

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Boner Preview #3: LOLA AND HER FRIEND ALONE ON THE DESERT

The following is a letter from our friend and X96 Program Director, Todd Nukem:

“My stepson is in the Army National guard and went out alone  to the west desert last Friday to do some target shooting.  He drove way, way out in the desert to make sure no one was around.  He got out to where there were no trees and very little sagebrush.  He came around a bend and saw a large poodle next to a sagebrush.  It was muddy and mangy and looked like it was almost dead.  He stopped and looked around and couldn’t see anyone.  Then he saw a Border Collie near another sagebrush.  He drove over the next hill to make sure no one was near and didn’t see anyone for miles and miles.

 He got out of his truck and the dogs approached him and he poured some of his water on the ground.  They tried to lap it up.  They looked horrible and were obviously  starving and dehydrated.  He cut open some water bottles he had with him and they each drank about 4 bottles of water each.  He called the Humane Society and they said to bring them in.  He tried to load the Collie in the back of his truck, but it jumped out.  He put the poodle in and it went to the front corner of the truck bed and curled into a ball.  The collie then went in and stayed.

 He took them to the Humane Society, where almost everyone praised him for saving them.  The dogs had tags and even a tag that said something about adopting a pet.  One of the workers at the humane society, however, told him that he should have taken the dogs to the shelter because they get funding and the Humane Society relies on donations.  He told her that he didn’t know that and that he thought of them because he’s seen their commercials on TV and thought it was the right place to take them.  She then told him that there would be a $50 fee  – for each dog  – to drop them off.  He looked her in the eye and told her that he’d take them back to the desert where he found them for $50.  Needless to say, they took the dogs for no fee.

 I HOPE the Humane Society is following up and the owner of these poor dogs is found and, if they were abandoned out there, punished.  I am just sick about this.  I can’t imagine what kind of person would take their dogs out to the desert in August and leave them to suffer and die.  I HOPE  there is a happier story here and he has reunited the dogs with a loving owner.

 I HOPE someone follows through on this.”

Boner Preview #4: OH MY GOD, WHY IS ANYONE TALKING TO THESE TWO?

Jaden and Willow Smith are truly living in their own universe. The teenagers, who are 18 and 15, spoke with the ever-evolving Pharrell Williams for Interview magazine’s September issue and gave us all another peek inside their fascinating minds. The two teenage philosophers opened up about wanting to make the world a better place, helping fans achieve their dreams and whether this is all really “real life.”

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Boner Preview #5: ANTHONY WEINER’S CHICK MAGNET

When Weiner’s sext partner jokingly told him to put his kid to work, he replied, “Already at work. Being a chick magnet.” Anthony Weiner didn’t just send his latest sexting partner a crotch shot selfie with his young son curled up next to him in bed — he boasted to the woman about using his child as a “chick magnet.” The stray-at-home dad’s stunning admission followed his repeated gripes about a lack of action in his marital bed, at one point complaining he was only having sex once every two months, according to screenshots obtained by The Post. Weiner told the woman he had dropped off the tyke “at grandpas after school,” but bellyached that the free baby-sitting “only bought me a couple of hours,” the screenshots show.

Boner Preview #6: YEP, YOU HAVE A PROBLEM IN UTAH

Steve Bannon, who was then the chairman of the right-wing Breitbart News, slammed Romney in October 2012 for failing to mention the war in Afghanistan during his nomination-acceptance speech at the Republican National Convention. “Mitt Romney goes to the Republican convention, gives his acceptance speech, people give him a standing ovation, and he doesn’t have the common decency to say one thing about our troops fighting in Afghanistan?” Bannon told Conservative Republican Forum Radio. “This is a guy who avoided military duty in Vietnam; who has five sons who look like movie stars who have not served their country one day. Oh, but by the way, all of them did their two years of Mormon missionary service — every one of them.”

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