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Boner Candidates for April 10, 2015

Boner Candidate #1: WE HAVE TO MAKE SURE HE’S WORTHY TO BE A FIRE FIGHTER

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Image By TheDeliciousLife

Five volunteer firefighters in Waxahachie, Texas were arrested by police this week after allegedly bending a trainee over and sodomizing him with a chorizo sausage. The firefighters, identified as Lt. Alec Chase Miller, 28, Lt. Keith Edward Wisakowsky, 26; Casey Joe Stafford, 30; Preston Thomas Peyrot, 19; and Blake Jerold Tucker, 19, allegedly sodomized a trainee, identified in the arrest affidavit as “John Doe #72,” with a chorizo sausage as part of a hazing ritual.

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Boner Candidate #2: WHAT BLANK HOLE STOOD ON HIS HEAD TO FIGURE THIS OUT

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Image By Tanya Hart

He’s had it for three years. Now, a Texas driver is being told to hand over his license plate, or it will be suspended.  The state has deemed the plate unacceptable. There are more than 120,000 personalized license plates available in Texas. Safeer Hasaan has had one on his Lamborghini for the last three years, according to KPRC.  It reads, “370h55V.” The problem is the state says this puzzling alpha-numeric jumble is no longer acceptable. They told him, “It has been determined that the personalization is offensive.” Haven’t figured it out why this plate could be considered offensive? How about when we flip it over?  You’re now looking at a blurred out cuss word, and it took the state some time to reach the conclusion.

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Boner Candidate #3: IT’S THE GOOD BOOK

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Image By avf

Despite concerns that giving the holy Bible the same status as a salamander is a little tawdry and could be unconstitutional, Tennessee lawmakers are forging ahead with plans to make it the official state book — something at least two other states have failed to do. The Tennessee measure has moved swiftly through the legislative process and could be on the House and Senate floors as early as next week. Similar proposals to make the Bible the state book failed in Mississippi earlier this year and in Louisiana last year. But Republican Sen. Steve Southerland of Morristown, the sponsor of the Tennessee proposal, said he believes it has a strong chance to pass. “It’s got 19 co-signers on it; it takes 17 people to vote for the bill,” he said Thursday

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Feature Image By honorbound

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