Boner of the Day

Boner Candidates for October 11, 2016

Boner Candidate #1: WAIT YOU GUYS. I THOUGHT THIS WAS A SCOOP.

Billy Bush brazenly bragged to NBC staff about the vulgar Donald Trump tape while covering the Olympics in Rio, multiple sources tell Page Six. Proving the infamous Ryan Lochte interview wasn’t Bush’s only Rio recklessness, the shamed “Today” host boasted at a party in August that he had a “tape of Trump being a real dog,” prompting staffers at “Access Hollywood” to track it down.

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Boner Candidate #2: WE ALL WASH OUR DOGS THIS WAY IN CALIFORNIA

A Comanche man is charged in an unusual case of animal cruelty. Someone said they saw the man pressure washing dogs and called police. Officers tried to get the man to stop and turn off the water, but he allegedly kept going, so police took him to jail. A 911 caller said something just wasn’t right.

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Boner Candidate #3: THE CROTCH-GRABBING LEADERS OF THE REPUBLICAN PARTY

Sen. Jeff Sessions (R-Ala.), a top Donald Trump surrogate, said on Sunday that even if the GOP nominee actually grabbed a woman “by the pussy,” as he bragged about in a leaked tape from 2005, that behavior would not amount to sexual assault.  “I don’t characterize that as sexual assault,” Sessions told The Weekly Standard in the spin room after Sunday night’s presidential debate. “I think that’s a stretch. I don’t know what he meant.”  “So if you grab a woman by the genitals, that’s not sexual assault?” the reporter asked Sessions.

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