Boner Candidate #1: PICK UP YOUR LEGOS OR MR. FLUFFY PANTS GETS IT
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A 71-year-old Illinois woman faces a felony animal cruelty charge for allegedly killing a cat and four kittens to punish her grandchildren for not cleaning their rooms.
Boner Candidate #2: LOOK LASHONDA, YOU WOULDN’T BE POOR IF YOU CHANGED YOUR NAME TO HEATHER
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A Duke University professor criticized for an online post comparing blacks and Asians said Monday that it’s not racist to discuss what he sees as differences in how the groups have performed in the US over the past few decades. Political science professor Jerry Hough has been sharply criticized for a response he posted in the online comments section of the New York Times editorial “How Racism Doomed Baltimore,” dated May 9. The 80-year-old professor, who is white, has been on an unrelated academic leave for the past school year. In his online comments, Hough wrote that Asians have been described as “yellow races” and faced discrimination in 1965 at least as bad as blacks experienced. Of Asian-Americans, he wrote: “They didn’t feel sorry for themselves, but worked doubly hard.” The posting goes on to say: “I am a professor at Duke University. Every Asian student has a very simple old American first name that symbolizes their desire for integration. Virtually every black has a strange new name that symbolizes their lack of desire for integration.”
Boner Candidate #3: CANCER ASSES
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A Tennessee man with ties to Utah and his family used much of the $187 million it collected for cancer patients to buy themselves cars, gym memberships and take luxury cruise vacations, pay for college tuition and employ family members with six-figure salaries, federal officials alleged Tuesday in one of the largest charity fraud cases ever, involving all 50 states.
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