Boners

Boner Fight for February 27th, 2018

Boner Candidate #1: THE VIDEO PROVES YOU CAN PEE THAT HIGH.

A boy in China thought it was a good idea to hose down the buttons in his elevator by peeing all over them. I have to say, he’s got an impressive spray, able to douse the entire panel. But soon after he zipped up and readied himself to disembark the lift, the doors jiggled around but didn’t open for him. The buttons started blinking in a glitchy fit, going haywire as the lights went dark. The boy was trapped, and according to Metro, had to be rescued by a maintenance crew. He tried to deny any wrong doing – even his parents came to his defense and said it would be impossible to pee that high – but hey, that’s where videos come in handy. His parents will have to pay for the damages.

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Boner Candidate #2: YOU HAVE “SEXY ASS TOES”.

An Army recruiter allegedly sent a nude photo to a 16-year-old girl after meeting her at a high school in Texas, telling her on Snapchat, “I’m no angel.” Adam Matthew Perkins 37, turned himself into police in Deer Park on Friday after a warrant was issued for his arrest on a charge of displaying harmful material to a minor. He allegedly sent a photo of his genitals to a 16-year-old Deer Park High School student via Snapchat, the Deer Park Police Department said Monday. Perkins met the female student while she was selling cake balls during a fundraiser at her school in December. The Army recruiter donated $20 before exchanging Snapchat usernames with the girl, the Dallas Morning News reports. The first photo sent by Perkins was a selfie showing him eating a cake ball, but investigators said subsequent messages took a sexual turn, with Perkins telling the teen: “I’m no angel.” Perkins also told the girl that she had “sexy ass toes,” police said. The girl reported receiving a nude photo of Perkins on a bed on Dec. 13. The image was visible on Snapchat for two to three seconds before disappearing, she told police.

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