Boners

Boner Fight for September 10th, 2018

Boner Candidate #1: THANK GOODNESS THEY LEFT US SOME CANDLES.

A woman in Connecticut was severely injured earlier this week after mistaking a quarter stick of dynamite for a candlestick. Officials said the woman’s residence lost power during a storm on Thursday night, ABC 7 reported. The family wasn’t able to buy emergency lights because Home Depot was closed, but according to the officials they recalled how the tenants before them had left behind what they thought were candles. The woman, who ABC 7 reports is around 30, lit what she believed to be a candle. It was dynamite, and it blew up in her hand. The woman reportedly injured her face and one of her hands, “including the potential loss of several fingers,” and a window was shattered. The victim’s husband and two children were home at the time, but there were no other reported injuries. One of the children reportedly called 911 after the dynamite went off. The state police, local fire department, fire marshal, as well as a bomb squad investigated the incident, evacuating the neighboring houses, according to NBC Connecticut. Officials reportedly found one other stick of dynamite in the house, which the fire and police department detonated and disposed of.

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Boner Candidate #2: SNAP CHATTIN’, CAT KICKIN’, CHURCH VANDALS

*One Boner, Three Stories!*

Vandals caused $5,000 worth of damage at a meetinghouse for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints late Sunday night or early Monday morning, officials said. The church, which is located at 989 S. Spanish Fork Parkway, had serious damage to the interior, according to a Facebook post from Spanish Fork Public Safety. Officials ask those with any information to contact the Spanish Fork Police at 801-804-4700.

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A leaked Snapchat video has led to the arrest of two suspects in connection with an incident at a Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints building in late August that left the church in shambles and resulted in approximately $10,000 in damage. Spanish Fork police Lt. Brandon Anderson said Kevin Hayes, 23 and Thomas Anderson, 20, both Spanish Fork residents, were booked into the Utah County Jail for investigation of burglary and criminal mischief. Lt. Anderson said a concerned citizen sent police a Snapchat video on Sept. 5 in which Hayes could be seen walking through the church’s gymnasium, which was recognized by police as the one that was vandalized. Damage to the facility, which occurred in the early morning hours of Aug. 27, included ripped hymnals, pictures removed from walls and smashed, fire extinguishers discharged in the building and damage done to plumbing fixtures and kitchen appliances.

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Prosecutors say a 20-year-old Spanish Fork man punched someone else’s cats in January over two days, forcing one of the pets to have jaw surgery and also puncturing a cat’s mouth. Thomas Tristian Anderson, 20, of Spanish Fork, was charged in 4th District Court last month in connection with Jan. 2 and 3 incidents in Orem. He faces two counts of torturing a companion animal, a third-degree felony. Anderson was briefly held in Utah County jail Monday in connection with the case and was released. It was not immediately clear if he had an attorney. Anderson “stated that the cats abuse him and he was defending himself,” Orem police officer Ben Haight wrote in a report in January. He did not specify Anderson’s relationship to the cat owner.

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