ROUND ONE
Boner Candidate #1: BECAUSE, BECAUSE, WHY?
A new bill introduced in the Utah senate has the potential to remove nearly half of the hard seltzer brands from stores.
Boner Candidate #2: I THINK I MAY HAVE GOTTEN GOD’S TIMING WRONG. I MEAN IF GOD COULD BE WRONG. ERRR, MAYBE I SHOULD STOP TALKING
Latter-day Saint leader Brad Wilcox stumbled through a bad apology for his ‘controversial’ comments about race.
Boner Candidate #3: PENCE HAS THIS TO SAY TO NIKKI HALEY; “I KNOW YOU ARE BUT WHAT AM I?”
Former ambassador Nikki Haley criticized Mike Pence for ‘betraying’ Donald Trump by saying that she isn’t a fan of republicans fighting republican despite herself being a republican slamming another republican.
ROUND TWO
Boner Candidate #1: HERCULES WANTS HEALTH CARE FOR ALL.
The former star of ‘Hercules’ Kevin Sorbo, made a poor argument against Covid-19 vaccines by asking: “If the shots were given away for free because they’re life-saving, why isn’t insulin free? Chemotherapy? Epipens?”
Boner Candidate #2: THERE WERE ERRORS, SO IT WONT KILL YOU TO BOIL THE DAMN WATER, BUT IT MAY KILL YOU IF YOU DON’T.
Officials in Austin Texas warned roughly a million of it’s residents that they have to boil their water due “errors from our operating staff at our Ullrich plant.”
Boner Candidate #3: WE FEEL THE SAME WAY WHEN YOU TALK ABOUT… WELL, JUST ABOUT ANYTHING.
Former PGA Tour host for SiriusXM Mark Lye was fired after saying:“I saw some highlights of ladies’ basketball. Man. Is there a gun in the house? I’ll shoot myself [before] I watch that.”
