Round One
Boner Candidate #1: THE TALKING DRONE IN KAYSVILLE
KAYSVILLE, Utah — Police are investigating reports of a drone approaching people and claiming to be Kaysville Police. A mysterious voice from the drone barks orders at the people it approaches.
The most recent alleged incident took place at Davis Technical College on Sunday. While the college wasn’t in session on Sunday, the school says people who aren’t students often take walks through the grounds. The college has a Frisbee golf course for the public to enjoy. On any given evening, people show up to throw discs at the baskets or walk their dogs. On Sunday around 8 p.m., people reported to police that a strange mechanic flying visitor began to approach them. “From a speaker attached to the drone, they were just giving announcements that they were Kaysville Police,” Kaysville Problem-Oriented Policing Officer Alexis Benson said. The voice from the drone told the people to evacuate, Benson said, but didn’t say what for. Davis Technical College Security Specialist John Morehead said they took a look at the surveillance footage. Surveillance only picked up two people on the entire campus. “The couple walking their dog over around the rotunda, the front of the campus, about that time period,” Morehead explained. While he indicated that it’s not clear if those two people are the ones who encountered the drone and called the police, a close look at the security footage reveals that the couple seems to get distracted by something in the distance. Read More
Boner Candidate #2: OH ELMO NO
NEW YORK — One of the costumed characters in New York City’s Times Square faces multiple charges after being accused of touching a teenage girl inappropriately, police said. According to authorities, the 14-year-old girl had just snapped a photo with the man dressed as Elmo from “Sesame Street” when he allegedly grabbed her buttocks. The incident happened around 6:30 p.m. on Saturday, police said. Inocente Andrade-Pacheco, of Passaic, New Jersey, was arrested and is now facing charges including forcible touching and acting in a manner injurious to a child, according to authorities. The incident is the latest in a long history of the costumed performers harassing and even fighting tourists, often stemming from arguments over tips. There were several notable violent incidents in 2014, including Spider-Man punching a police officer in the face. The same year, Woody from Toy Story was nabbed for reportedly groping several young girls, and Cookie Monster was cuffed for allegedly attacking a toddler. In response to the violence, the city created “designated activity zones” in Times Square to section-off where characters can be and minimize peddling. “What happened yesterday is an example of certain characters feel like they can get away with just about anything,” said Tim Tompkins, President of the Times Square Alliance.
Boner Candidate #3: DAZED AND CONFUSED
Is Courtney Love ok? This week, the singer looked dazed and confused while on a solo lunch with her pup in New York city. The 55-year-old — who is in town for NYFW — was spotted grabbing a bite in Soho with her dog this Monday, September 9. While enjoying a croissant and a cappuccino, the wild star noticed her pet pooped on the floor next to her feet. Visibly irritated, Courtney wrapped up the poop in some napkins and placed it on her plate! The singer seemed unfazed by her own bizarre actions and continued eating, eventually asking a waiter for a paper bag, in which she then placed the dog poop. During the solo outing, Courtney continuously widened her eyes while looking at her phone. She looked casual in loose grey sweatpants, a white T-shirt, and black sneakers. Her hair was messy and she seemed to be wearing no makeup. The singer filed a restraining order against her ex manager Sam Lutfi over messages she claims are “threatening,” Radar confirmed in 2018. Love claimed Lutfi, 45, bombarded her with emails and phone calls over what he claims to be unpaid bills. This January 2019, Courtney’s restraining order was granted. Sam must also stay away from Love’s daughter Frances Bean Cobain, who she shares with the late Kurt Cobain. While it’s unclear what Courtney’s relationship with her daughter is like now, Radar readers recall that in 2018, the two were on each other’s throats after a blowup over Kurt’s private diaries. Sources said Frances Bean, 27, was “devastated” after she found out her ex-junkie mom handed over Kurt’s private journals to the Museum of Style Icons in Newbridge, County Kildare, Ireland. Read More
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Round Two
Boner Candidate #1: SAVE THE BUNNIES
A vegan activist in Spain who claimed to have been attacked by an angry mob last week — after she “rescued” 16 rabbits from their farm — wound up causing the deaths of nearly 100 baby bunnies in the process, a report says. The activist, who goes by the name “Mythical Mia” on social media, conducted the alleged rescue mission on a farm near Osono last Sunday, according to the Spanish newspaper La Vanguardia. Five rabbits, which were pregnant and about to give birth, were killed during the chaotic retrieval and several others were left with broken spines, the paper reports, citing an assessment from a local veterinarian. A number of the rabbits that Mythical Mia, a Barcelona-based activist, took that day were said to have been pregnant or lactating. Their offspring included an estimated 90 bunnies, which had to be euthanized after being abandoned, according to La Vanguardia. The mama bunnies that got left behind but survived were reportedly forced to have abortions. Mia, whose real name is unknown, posted a video on her Instagram page last week “documenting” the bloody aftermath of her rabbit rescue. “This is what has just happened to us, look, I’m documenting the whole thing,” she said. “I’m covered in blood. This is what the farmers have done. They shot through our window and chased us down the motorway. Oh my God, I’m literally covered in blood.” Read More
Boner Candidate #2: WE CAN SAVE AMERICA IF WE GET RID OF COLLEGE
A Republican Tennessee lawmaker says he supports getting rid of higher education because he argues it would cut off the “liberal breeding ground.” Sen. Kerry Roberts of Springfield called for eliminating higher education while speaking about attending a recent abortion legislative hearing on his conservative radio talk show on Sept. 2. Roberts specifically called out one activist who testified in favor of protecting abortion rights. He asserted, without evidence, that the woman’s beliefs were a “product of higher education” and claimed that getting rid of higher education would “save America.” The senator did not immediately respond to a request for further elaboration. Roberts also questioned funding higher education with tax dollars. He voted in favor of the state’s $38.5 billion budget earlier this year, which included money for colleges and universities. Read More
Boner Candidate #3: MOCKING THE DEAF
Watch the video here
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