Boners

Boner Preview Candidates for December 8, 2016

Boner Candidate #1: GETTIN’ SO SOME GANGSTERS CAN’T HAVE A LITTLE FUN.

Video of a mannequin challenge that was designed to look like a shooting led Alabama authorities to raid a Huntsville home on Tuesday, leading to two arrests on gun and drug charges, law enforcement officials announced. In the nearly one-minute mannequin challenge video posted on Facebook last month, multiple people appear pointing guns at one another as if an shootout is underway outside a residence, AL.com reported.

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Boner Candidate #2: GETTIN’ SO A WOMAN CAN’T EVEN TWERK ON HER OWN CAR

At the end of the day, it just didn’t twerk out.  A noise complaint made about a Gainesville woman landed her in jail after she refused to stop twerking on her car and playing loud music, the Independent Florida Alligator reported. It was 3:15 a.m. Saturday when Gainesville police found Danielle Lanae Jefferson, 35, dancing to loud rap music, according to a police report. The officers were responding to a noise complaint placed by Jefferson’s neighbors, alleging that Jefferson had been playing the music for more than 20 minutes.

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Boner Candidate #3: IT WAS ONE OF THOSE ROOMY, WALK-IN CLOSETS AND THEY HAD RICE AND BEANS.

Seven teens with special needs are recovering in the hospital after being rescued from the Texas home where they were forced to live together in a closet, authorities said. They were regularly locked in a closet with a deadbolt for so long that they urinated on themselves among the clothes and boxes. They had never attended school even though they were teenagers with special needs. One child with Down syndrome was found wearing a dirty diaper in the home in Richmond, Texas.

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Boner Candidate #4: ANOTHER CANDIDATE FOR MOM OF THE YEAR

A West Valley woman was driving a car with about $10,000 worth of drugs and three unbuckled young children inside when she led officers on a pursuit last week, according to criminal charges filed Wednesday. Sadie Shantel Leavitt, 25, is charged in 4th District Court with seven felonies and 10 other crimes stemming from the Dec. 1 incident in Springville. Leavitt led officers on a low-speed chase after police followed her and attempted to pull her over following a drug deal they suspected she had carried out at Love’s Travel Stop, 358 S. 2200 West, according to charging documents.

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Boner Candidate #5: I WANT TO PUT OUT THE FIRE. NO. I WANT TO PUT IT OUT FIRST. OH YEAH?

Two Maryland firefighters have been accused of assaulting a female firefighter from another station during a fight over which unit should go first inside a burning home. Prince George’s County State’s Attorney Angela Alsobrooks says volunteer firefighters Jeffry Miller and Chris Kelly were indicted Tuesday on multiple charges including second-degree assault and interfering with a firefighter. Alsobrooks says a unit of firefighters arrived first at the Hyattsville blaze last December, but Kelly, who wasn’t in full gear, blocked the door, preventing them from entering. The state’s attorney says Kelly hit the female firefighter, knocking her off the porch. The woman tried entering again, but officials said Miller grabbed her and pulled her away.

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Boner Candidate #6: I WAS LOOKING FOR MY KEYS. I’D LOST MY KEYS AND I WAS LOOKING FOR THEM.

Deputies have arrested a Sarasota man who was caught on camera looking up women’s skirts at a Sarasota Walmart in October.  The Sarasota County Sheriff’s Office says Alan Ralph, 62, was at the Cattlemen Road Walmart on October 29 and surveillance video captured him looking up the skirts of multiple women while walking around the store. One of the victims contacted the Sheriff’s Office about the incident and deputies confirmed the report and found that Ralph had victimized several other women by kneeling down and looking up their skirts in the store.  Ralph is currently behind bars without bond.

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