Boner of the Day

Boner Preview for February 16th, 2017

Thursday Preview

Boner Candidate #1: SORRY CARLOS, YOU CAN’T WEASEL OUT OF THIS ONE

Carlos Santana is attempting to stop the BeyHive’s swarm by explaining a comment he made about Beyoncé after the weekend’s Grammy Awards. The legendary guitarist angered Beyoncé fans by suggesting Adele won the big prize of the night, Album of the Year, over the expecting mom because Beyoncé is “not a singer.” “I think that Adele won because she can sing, sing,” Santana told the Australian Associated Press. “With all respect to our sister Beyoncé. Beyoncé is very beautiful to look at and it’s more like modeling kind of music —music to model a dress — she’s not a singer, singer, with all respect to her.” He continued, “Adele can sing, sing. She doesn’t bring all the dancers and props. She can just stand there and she just stood there and sang the song and that’s it, and this is why she wins.” Santana, who has won 13 Grammy Awards, took to Facebook on Tuesday to “clarify” the remark, saying he meant only to compliment Adele on her achievement. “My intent was to congratulate Adele on her amazing night at the Grammies [sic],” he wrote. “My comment about Beyoncé was regretfully taken out of context. I have the utmost respect for her as an artist and a person. She deserves all the accolades that come her way. I wish Beyoncé and her family all the best.”

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Boner Candidate #2: THE PAIN PILL 2017 TOUR

In a frenzied doctor shopping spree, a Florida woman was transported by ambulance to seven different hospitals in a 26-hour period in a bid to obtain prescription pain medication, according to police who arrested her for misuse of the 911 system. Investigators charge that Kimberly Keener, 40, repeatedly called 911 for transport to hospitals in Pinellas County. Beginning early Thursday morning, Keener, a Bradenton resident, was brought to seven separate hospitals by Sunstar Paramedics, which provides ambulance services in Pinellas County. Keener sought to “obtain fraudulent prescription pain medication,” according to an arrest affidavit. Court filings do not indicate what maladies Keener claimed as she repeatedly called 911, or whether her scheme was a success

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Boner Candidate #3: THE CAMPUS POLICE SHOULD HAVE STOPPED ME

A New Jersey man convicted of randomly punching fellow students at a Massachusetts university is now suing Endicott College, claiming the school was lax in enforcing underage drinking laws. Dillon DeStefano, 22, of River Vale, cited Massachusetts’ social host liability law in his lawsuit against the private college in Beverly, Mass., and president Richard Wylie. DeStefano alleges the school’s tacit approval of underage drinking on campus caused him to “become so extremely intoxicated that he lost the capacity to conform his actions to the requirements of the law,” the Salem News reports. The lawsuit, which seeks losses for damages to DeStefano’s reputation and for pain and suffering, was filed on Feb. 1, three years to the day after DeStefano randomly punched three students at the college without provocation. The suit was filed just as the statute of limitations was set to expire as well, the newspaper reports.

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Boner Candidate #4: THE NEIGHBORS RALLY, BUT WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN?

An Asian family in Oakdale, Minnesota was on the receiving end of an extreme act of hatred.  The Xiongs, who are of Hmong descent, found the racial slur “chinks” spray painted across their garage on Sunday, the Oakdale Police Department confirmed.  While the incident has been written up as criminal damage to property, it’s currently under investigation, police Capt. Karin LaTour told the Huffington Post. However, there are no suspects at this time.  “We don’t have words to describe how we feel,” Linda Xiong, who lives with her siblings and parents in the house, told WCCO of the incident.  She explained to the outlet that a newspaper delivery person had woken the family up early that day to alert them of the offensive graffiti. According to a police report, the spray painting had taken place in the early morning hours, shortly after another car in the area had been vandalized.  The family was shocked by the incident as they’d just moved to the area and were excited to live in a larger home.  “We just moved in two months ago haven’t done anything wrong to anyone,” family member TL Xiong wrote on Facebook. “We all have to acknowledge that racism has been going on [for] more than hundreds of years before our grandparents, parents and now including my very own generation.”

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Boner Candidate #5:  IF WE DEPORT YOU, HE WON’T BEAT YOU ANY MORE

Federal immigration agents went to the El Paso County Courthouse last week and arrested an undocumented woman who had just received a protective order alleging that she was a victim of domestic violence. The agents apparently detained the woman Feb. 9 after receiving a tip, possibly from her alleged abuser, whom they already had in custody, El Paso County Attorney Jo Anne Bernal said. The detention has alarmed Bernal and other county officials who fear that the arrest will scare undocumented victims of domestic abuse into staying with their abusers for fear of being deported and separated from their children or other family members. However, a criminal complaint on file with the U.S. District Court in El Paso indicates that a person of the same name as the alleged victim might have a history of deportation and domestic violence.  Bernal was not aware of the complaint, filed by U.S. immigration officials, when she spoke about the arrest earlier in the day. She said, however, that her office cooperates with federal authorities when serious crimes are alleged. But she and other officials said protective-order courts are not the place for immigrant detentions. “Our clients come to us at the lowest point in their lives,” said Bernal, whose office represents domestic abuse victims when they seek court orders against their abusers. “Many of them are so frightened of coming to us because of possible immigration concerns.”

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Boner Candidate #6: THERE IS NO ROOM FOR RACISM IN PRIVATE EITHER

The Price Police Department confirmed Wednesday it launched an investigation over a Facebook comment allegedly written by one of the department’s officers. Police Chief Kevin Drolc said members of the public called to complain. The post, a screenshot of which was sent to Fox 13, contains racist content. The comment, in exact wording and grammar, reads, “Ol’ Busta, once again demonstrated the prime example of a Typical coward [N-word] BTW: I don’t use the term much… But, when I do, It’s equivalent to one satanic S.O.B . It’s kinda just like sayin’ ‘Obama;, Same diff… LOL” While the comment appears to have been made on a private post not accessible to the public, a screenshot of the comment started to circulate. Price residents who were shown the comment were surprised. “Wow dude, like, come on, you put that on Facebook? Eventually somebody is going to see it,” said local William Gutierrez. “To say that on social media, to say the ‘N’ word like that, and be a police officer. Yeah that’s, that’s a little crazy to me, that kind of blows my mind a little bit.”

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