Boner of the Day

Boner (Round One) for May 19th, 2017

Boner Candidate #1: DON’T TELL ME WHERE THE CHEESE AND PEPPERONI GOES

After an argument sparked by how pepperoni and cheese were placed on a pizza, a Pizza Hut supervisor pepper-sprayed a coworker, according to a police report. Sandy Springs Police have issued a warrant for the arrest of Anderson Ramon Lewis for disorderly conduct. The pepper spray was discharged in the direction of the female victim’s face, but police said it didn’t seriously harm her as it landed on her arm. According to the report, police responded to the Pizza Hut at 4920 Roswell Road on Tuesday around 7 p.m.

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Boner Candidate #2: HE COULD NOT RESIST…HE’S IN LOVE.

Authorities say a Florida man leaned in to kiss a rattlesnake — but got bitten instead. News outlets report the unidentified man was bitten on the tongue Tuesday in the Bostwick area and had to be airlifted to a hospital, where he was listed in critical condition. WTLV in Jacksonville quoted a friend of the victim as saying that he had been drinking while handling the seemingly calm eastern diamondback. But when he moved toward the reptile as if to kiss it, the snake bit him.

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Boner Candidate #3: PAY NO ATTENTION TO THE TOOELE HIGH SCHOOL WEB SITE

Online visitors to tooelehigh.org won’t find the academic calendar for Tooele High School or info on Buffalo athletics. Instead, they’ll see galleries of young women posing in lingerie. After transitioning to a new web address, the high school’s old domain was purchased and held for “ransom,” according to a letter sent to parents and community members by Tooele High School Principal Jeffrey Hamm.

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