Boner of the Day

Boner (Round Two) for December 1st, 2017

Boner Candidate #1: NOW WHERE WILL WE GET CLOTHES TO WEAR TO THE TRUMP RALLY?

Walmart removed a controversial T-shirt urging violence against journalists from its website after a news association asked for it to be pulled amid “today’s vitriolic political and ideological environment,” according to a report. The Radio Television Digital News Association announced Thursday that the nation’s largest retailer on Wednesday removed the T-shirt — which reads: “Rope. Tree. Journalist. SOME ASSEMBLY REQUIRED” — from its online store. In a Nov. 29 letter to top Walmart executives, the Washington-based organization “respectfully” requested that Walmart remove the shirt from its website.

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Boner Candidate #2: I WANT MY DAMN NUGGETS!

A wise young “nugget boy” once said “a man needs his nuggs,” but one person may have taken things too far. Kole Olsen, 30, of Australia plead guilty Thursday to his involvement in a bizarre incident involving an exceptionally supersized order at a McDonald’s on Sydney’s north shore in the wee hours of the morning earlier this month, 9 news reports. Taking drunk munchies to memorable levels, he tried to order 200 chicken nuggets at the drive-thru window only to learn the disappointing news that they weren’t on the breakfast menu. Australia’s The Telegraph reported that he then drove around four more times while honking and saying “I want my f-cking nuggets….I’m gonna f-ck you up.” Despite his nugget quest, he told the court he was “vegan” Thursday.

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Boner Candidate #3: WHAT IS THE WORST NAME I CAN GIVE MY WIFI?

While it’s magnificent that you can connect to the internet while you’re soaring in a metal tube miles above ground, there are still shitheads who are going to use this modern wonder for evil. Most recently, a passenger aboard a flight from Nairobi to Istanbul created a Wi-Fi hotspot and named the network “bomb on board,” which prompted an emergency landing. The Turkish Airlines flight landed in Sudan after the suspicious Wi-Fi network was detected, Reuters reported, and resumed after the plane and all 100 passengers had gone through a security inspection. “Experts said the wi-fi network in question was created on board,” the airline told Reuters. “No irregularities were seen after security procedures were carried out, and passengers were brought back on the plane once boarding restarted.”

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