Boners

Boner (Round Two) for January 4th, 2018

Boner Candidate #1: YOU CAN PRAY THE GAY AWAY.

An evangelical Christian group is using social media to promote the scientifically discredited and flat-out lethal idea that gay, lesbian, or bisexual people can change their sexual orientation if they pray hard enough. Anchored North, a conservative Christian charity, tells the story of a young woman named Emily Thomes in a video titled “Love is Love.” Thomes says that after studying the Bible and repenting of her sins, she was able to leave her “super wild” life as a lesbian and marry a man. The video appears to be designed to attract the attention of young queer people or teens who are questioning their sexuality. “Love is Love” is a phrase often used to promote acceptance of LGBTQ relationships. Anchored North also used a rainbow flag in the video’s thumbnail, appropriating what has become a unifying symbol of the gay rights movement. The first few moments of the video seem innocent enough ― with scenes of teens dancing to catchy party music and two girls laughing and holding hands while walking down a street. Thomes is presented as a relatable narrator, introducing herself as someone who fell in love with a girl when she was 15 and soon started proudly identifying as gay. But, despite the video’s friendlier packaging, Thomes claims that queer people can change their sexual orientation if they try. “People say to me all the time, ‘I was born this way.’ I say, OK, yeah, me too,’” she says at one point in the video. “You’re not born with right affections. That’s why Jesus had to come. You feeling a desire for sin just proves you need grace like me.”

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Boner Candidate #2: HOW ELSE ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO DEAL WITH A BAD GIRL?

The chairman of a company that publishes six newspapers in Alabama has been accused of assaulting female employees by spanking them while he was a newsroom executive decades ago. In reports published in Alabama news outlets, at least three women say H. Brandt Ayers, who became a nationally known voice of Southern liberalism during his tenure as editor and publisher at the Anniston Star, assaulted them in the mid-1970s, once using a metal ruler. The women and other former newsroom employees say Ayers had a reputation for spanking other women. Ayers — now 82 and chairman of Consolidated Publishing Co., which operates six papers including the Star — issued a statement saying he “did some things I regret” when he was a “very young man with more authority than judgment.” An online publication, Alabama Political Reporter, first reported the allegations of former Star employee Veronica Pike Kennedy. The Star later published its own account quoting Kennedy and two other women who declined to have their names published; the Montgomery Advertiser also interviewed Kennedy and cited one woman who asked to remain anonymous.

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Boner Candidate #3: SOMEBODY COULD GET HURT BY THOSE T-SHIRTS

Two Tooele High School seniors thought the shirt they wore to class Tuesday showed support for the military and each other’s decision to join the Army. However, the school’s principal didn’t share the same beliefs. “I love [the] Principal,” said Jaden Brown, one of the two students. “I have respect for him, and I see why [he made the decision], but I was just a little let down that I couldn’t wear the shirt.” It all started after the boys received a Christmas present. The gift was two shirts with the phrase “Brothers in Arms” on the back, along with a picture of an M-4. The gift came from one of the boy’s parents. Brown plans to graduate a semester early so he can report to Basic Training in Georgia by March. His best friend, Seth Nelson, plans to sign up for the Army next week when he turns 18. So, this Christmas might have been their last together for a while. “We were just like, ‘We are going to wear these on the first day of school coming back,” Nelson said. The pair said they made it through the entire day at school without drawing a comment or the eye of any of the teachers. “I was in the parking lot in my car when the Principal came up to me,” Brown said. He said the principal told him he couldn’t wear the shirt.

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