Boner of the Day

Boner of the Day for March 21st, 2019

Round 1

Candidate #1: WAIT, YOU’VE SUFFERED EMOTIONAL DISTRESS?

A referee who forced a New Jersey high school wrestler to cut his dreadlocks or forfeit a match in December has taken the first step toward filing a lawsuit alleging defamation of character and emotional distress. Alan Maloney, who is white, claims in a legal filing that he “properly performed his duties as the referee and fairly applied the rules governing a wrestling match” when he ordered Andrew Johnson, a black varsity wrestler from Atlantic County to cut his hair before a match. A video of the haircut went viral and drew widespread condemnation, including from New Jersey Gov. Phil Murphy, Olympic wrestler Jordan Burroughs and the state ACLU. It showed Johnson looking dejected as a trainer from his school, Buena Regional High, sheared his dreadlocks. The state’s Civil Rights Division and its interscholastic athletic association started separate investigations into the incident.

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Candidate #2: COME ON MAN….EGG ROLLS

A Milton man has been arrested after he allegedly shoved a woman when the she wouldn’t let him in the house to eat egg rolls. According to the offense report from the Milton Police Department the victim stated 44-year-old Keith Johnson was drunk and she told him to she did not want him in her home. The report says Johnson kept ringing the doorbell even after she told him she wasn’t letting him in. The report says Johnson wanted to come in and eat egg rolls that were in the house, so the woman told him she would bring them out to him. That’s when he allegedly shoved her inside the door, the report said.

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Candidate #3: IT SEEMS THEY’VE BEEN FILLING, NOT DRAINING THE SWAMP

Faith Vander Voort, the newly promoted top spokeswoman at the Interior Department, voiced support for more surveillance of Muslim communities and argued that attacks by radical self-proclaimed Muslim groups pose a far bigger threat to society than climate change during a 2017 interview full of Islamophobic and anti-immigrant rhetoric. The comments were made during a June 8, 2017, episode of “The Word,” a podcast of the now-defunct right-wing news outlet The Daily Nerv. Vander Voort co-founded The Daily Nerv in early 2017, about a year before she joined the Trump administration, and briefly co-produced and co-hosted the podcast, according to her resume on Interior’s website.
During the episode in question, Vander Voort says she does not believe it is a violation of individual civil liberties for intelligence agencies to monitor phones and internet activities ― at least when it comes to surveillance of Muslim communities. “I think that terrorists attacking us are the real infringement on our freedom,” she said. “Our freedom comes from our safety and ability to follow our dreams and live a happy and free life here in the United States. It doesn’t come from us being able to send whatever we want without anyone looking.”

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Round 2

Candidate #1: WE GOT LOTS OF DOWN LOADS; LOTS OF HITS.

An Arizona woman has been accused of abusing her seven adopted children who starred in her YouTube videos, CBS affiliate KPHO-TV reports. Authorities learned about Machelle Hobson’s alleged actions from her 19-year-old daughter, according to police in Maricopa, Arizona. Hobson and her two adult sons, Logan and Ryan Hackney, were arrested last week, KPHO-TV reports. Hobson was booked on suspicion of molestation of a child, child abuse, unlawful imprisonment and child neglect, and the men were booked on suspicion of failing to report abuse of a minor. When police came to the family’s house, they found one child in an unlocked closet who was only wearing a diaper, according to a police report. The other six children appeared to be malnourished. “I either get beat with a hanger or belt,” one boy told police, according to the report. He also said that he would be pinched in his private parts.

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Candidate #2: OH….MY…..GOD

Gov. Matt Bevin thinks the government shouldn’t mandate vaccines because “This is America.” Kentucky Gov. Matt Bevin (R) intentionally exposed his nine children to chickenpox instead of vaccinating them against the disease, he said in a radio interview on Tuesday. “Every single one of my kids had the chickenpox,” Bevin told WKCT, a Bowling Green talk radio station, according to The Louisville Courier-Journal. “They got the chickenpox on purpose because we found a neighbor that had it and I went and made sure every one of my kids was exposed to it, and they got it. They had it as children. They were miserable for a few days, and they all turned out fine.” The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention strongly warns against exposing children to chickenpox as a way of immunizing them.

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Candidate #3: AND THEY SHOULD BE SHAMED

A passenger was caught using the back of three seats to dry three different swimsuits while on what appears to be a GOL airlines flight. The photo was snapped by another passenger on the Brazilian airline and sent to the popular Instagram page Passenger Shaming, where it was posted earlier this week.
“PRO TRAVEL TIP: If you have a wet bathing suit, or three — AIRPLANE HEADREST DRYER,” the Instagram caption joked.
The photo quickly gathered nearly 3,000 likes and dozens of comments from people outraged by the person’s behavior.

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