Boners

Boner (Round One and Two) for July 16th, 2018

Round One

Boner Candidate #1: I WAS MAKIN’ DO.

 

 

 

 

 

A motorist was stopped by police for driving while sitting on a bucket and steering with pliers. The battered car, which also had no front wing, bumper, headlights and a flat tyre was pulled over in King’s Lynn in Norfolk. Norfolk’s roads policing unit tweeted pictures of “the most un-roadworthy car” and said there were “too many offences to mention”. Police said the driver has been reported to court. “Yes this was driven on a road and yes he was sitting on a bucket and steering with a pair of mole grips,” officers wrote, as they posted pictures of the vehicle in Saddlebow Road. Dozens of people have commented on the shocking state of the vehicle.

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Boner Candidate #2: HEADS OR TAILS?

A flip of a coin by Georgia cops determined a woman’s fate during a traffic stop in April, body camera footage showed. The video showed Roswell police officers laughing as they used a coin-flip app to decide whether to detain Sarah Webb during a traffic stop, 11 Alive reported. Officer Courtney Brown was heard asking Webb whether she knew how fast she was going. Webb apologized and said she was late for work, and Brown asked her to turn off the car and hand over her keys. “The ground is wet and it’s been raining you’re going over 80 miles an hour on this type of a road. That’s reckless driving,” Brown said. “I’m so sorry,” Webb replied. Brown returned to her police cruiser to talk with fellow officers about whether to arrest Webb or just give her ticket.“What do you think?” Kristee Wilson, a responding officer, was heard saying. Brown said she “didn’t have speed detection,” but the other officer pointed out that the body camera recorded her cruiser’s speed, which would have shown how fast she was going to catch up to Webb. Brown was then heard saying, “Hold on,” as she opens a coin-flip app on her phone. Wilson suggested that heads should mean arrest and tails should mean release. Brown agreee and flipped the coin in the app.

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Boner Candidate #3: I POSTED THIS PICTURE SO EVERYONE CAN SEE WHAT A LIAR MY WIFE IS.

St. Paul City Council candidate David Martinez posted a topless photo of his wife in a blog entry on his campaign website. An “unhinged” Minnesota city council candidate is under investigation for posting a topless photo of his wife to his official campaign website in response to an order of protection she filed against him. In a July 14 blog entry on the now-deleted page, David Martinez of St. Paul included the picture alongside a heated commentary on the couple’s marital troubles and a copy of the restraining order cops had served him one day earlier. Martinez has a “history of restraining me physically against my wishes and forcing himself on me,” his estranged wife wrote in the document, in which she requested — and was granted — full temporary custody of their two children.“His behavior has continued to escalate over the past 3-4 weeks,” she wrote. “He has been diagnosed with major depression in the past, and his mental state seems to be impacting his behavior.” She said she’d called police to the family’s house as recently as July 4, when the belligerent would-be politico, shouting and hurling threats, forced her to leave the home and locked her out when she tried to return for their 8-year-old daughter and 10-year-old son.

Round Two

Boner Candidate #1: YET ANOTHER “FOOT RELATED” INCIDENT.

Video of an AirAsia passenger playing with his bare feet on a crowded plane has gone viral online. Jade Thomas and her boyfriend Trong Nguyen were traveling from Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, to Hanoi, Vietnam, Sunday afternoon when they noticed another passenger seated across the aisle with his bare feet propped up on the seat in front of him, The Sun reportedThe unidentified man proceeded to pick dried skin from his feet and drop it onto the plane floor, while on the packed Airbus 320. Thomas, from Queensland, Australia, told The Sun, “I was returning from a trip to Bali with my boyfriend [when] we observed some poor behavior.” Thomas explained to the publication that the entire plane was pretty rowdy, but the barefoot man was one toe over the line for her.

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Boner Candidate #2:HEY CHIEF, ISN’T THAT BRANDON?

 Police recognize man fleeing from them on stolen motorcycle, dump out of the chase and wait for him at his house to make arrest. A West Jordan man is facing charges after fleeing from police on a stolen motorcycle during a traffic stop for what police said was a “simple traffic violation.”West Jordan Police said they made the stop around eight o’clock Saturday night near 7000 S. Redwood Road, the motorcyclist quickly took off. However, officers decided not to follow the man, because they recognized him. Instead officers went to 38-year-old Brandon Briggs’ home and waiting for him to return. About an hour after the stop police said Briggs showed up at his house and was taken into custody without incident.

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Boner Candidate #3: SWAT THAT BUG!

 

 

 

 

 

The Indiana State Police said a semi driver “tried to swat” a fly that flew in through his window and ended up crashing on the highway. Troopers said Christopher Walker, 28, was driving in the southbound lanes of Interstate 65 near Lowell about 9:35 a.m. Thursday when a fly came into the cab of his semi truck through the window. Walker “attempted to swat the bug” and the momentary distraction caused him to strike a guardrail on the right side of the road. The truck then hit a concrete construction barrier, causing the trailer to come loose and split open, spilling 42,000 pounds of plastic rolls to spill out onto the roadway.

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