Boner of the Day

Boner Candidate Preview September 13, 2016

Boner Preview #1: THIS WILL BE FUNNY

Twelve-year-old Jordynn Peake knows she still has to go to school. But if she didn’t, she would spend almost all her time riding King, her favorite horse. “He has a lot of energy. No matter how much you ride him, he has so much energy,” Peake said. So, when her family bought this horse property in Eagle Mountain a few months ago, she couldn’t wait to discover new trails. “They got here actually last Saturday, so that was kind of my first ride on him out of the neighborhood,” Peake said. It was a ride she’ll always remember for all the wrong reasons.

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Boner Preview #2: WE NEED TO ASK THESE BLOKES TO LEAVE THE COUNTRY

A crew of revelers toting a blow-up sex doll stopped to take selfies by the 9/11 Memorial in lower Manhattan Friday — but police quickly showed them the exit. The life-size sex doll disgusted mourners marking the 15th anniversary of the terror attacks at the memorial at the World Trade Center. The revelers, tourists from England, took tasteless selfies by the reflecting pool — where the names of the nearly 3,000 killed on 9/11 are etched in marble.

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Boner Preview #3: WHEN WILL THIS INSECT CRAWL BACK INTO THE WOOD WORK WHERE HE BELONGS?

Attention-loving pharma bad boy Martin Shkreli took advantage of Hillary Clinton’s Sunday-morning health scare to scream “Why are you so sick?” as she left daughter Chelsea Clinton’s apartment afterward.

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Boner Preview #4: LET’S TEST THIS THING

Police say a Florida man asking if a bulletproof vest “still worked” was fatally shot by his cousin. A Tampa Police report says 23-year-old Joaquin Mendez put on the vest late Saturday and “wondered aloud whether it still worked.” Police say his cousin, 24-year-old Alexandro Garibaldi, pulled out a gun and responded, “Let’s see.”

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Boner Preview #5: SEX AND PAIN GO TOGETHER

A judge in Canada is facing removal from the bench for his conduct when he asked a woman in a rape case why she couldn’t “just keep [her] knees together.” Federal Court Judge Robin Camp is in the midst of a week-long judicial council hearing, which will determine whether he ought to be booted from his position. The case in question took place in 2014 when Camp was a provincial court judge. (He became a Federal Judge last year.)

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Boner Preview #6: MAY BE CONSIDERED A HATE CRIME? MAY BE?

A Muslim woman wearing religious attire was set on fire in New York City on Saturday night, just hours before the anniversary of the Sept. 11, 2001 terrorist attacks.  The woman, a Scottish tourist shopping on Fifth Avenue, noticed her sleeve was on fire and quickly put it out, the New York Daily News reported. “She saw (the suspect) pull a lighter away and walk away,” a police source told the newspaper. “He doesn’t say anything.”

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