Boners

Boner Candidate Preview September 7, 2016

Boner Preview #1: NOT A CARE GIVER, REALLY

Police say a caregiver ran errands at a shopping mall while her non-verbal, special needs male patient roasted in a transport van on a sweltering hot summer day. According to criminal charging documents, Afia Obour, 26, of Gaithersburg, parked her transport van at the Lakeforest Mall around 8 p.m. on Aug. 2. A passerby later called 911 upon seeing the special needs man red-faced, unresponsive and sweating profusely inside the red Dodge Caravan. Paramedics took him to Shady Grove Adventist Hospital for heat exhaustion; his body temperature was 102 degrees.

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Boner Preview #2: F YOU…MY ACCOUNT WAS HACKED

A New Jersey Republican ended his campaign for local office Tuesday following reports that he called online for the rape of a Washington-based reporter for news and opinion website The Daily Beast. Mike Krawitz, who was running for the township council in West Deptford, sent a handwritten resignation note to the party Tuesday saying he was dropping out.

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Boner Preview #3: NICE TRY HONEY, BUT I DRIVE A FORD ESCORT

A young Florida woman who was smoking mad at her ex-boyfriend tried to set fire to his car. The only problem was the vehicle belonged to a total stranger. Carmen Chamblee, 19, was arrested Saturday and charged with arson after she allegedly lit a rag on fire and stuffed it into the gas tank of the white-colored Honda late last month. Surveillance video showed Chamblee feeding the flames in the trunk of the car parked on the side of a road in Clearwater.

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Boner Preview #4: YOU SHOULD ASK MY GIRLFRIEND WHY SHE HASN’T ANSWERED BY LETTERS

When police in Louisiana accused David Plaisance of stalking a radio personality for more than a decade, he denied any wrongdoing. “I’m not doing anything wrong,” the 63-year-old Baton Rouge resident told police. “I’m only sending letters to my girlfriend.”

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Boner Preview #5: MELBOURNE. MALAYSIA. WHAT’S THE DIFF?

An Air Asia pilot may want to consider an extended holiday after flying his plane to the south-eastern Australian city of Melbourne instead of the (very different) South East Asian country of Malaysia. In March of 2015 an AirAsia X Airbus A330 had an intended flight path from Sydney, Australia to Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia. Unfortunately for the passengers on-board a snow ball effect of technical errors meant they ended up in the wrong country.

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Boner Preview #6: A LITTLE BIT OF WOO WOO IN FRONT OF THE WAWA

Customers at a Pennsylvania Wawa store got an eyeful in the parking lot as Pa. State Police say an intoxicated naked woman was caught performing a ‘lewd act’ with another woman inside a parked car with its windows down. Our sister website, LehighValleyLive.com, reports that 25-year-old Samantha Dier, of Allentown, is accused of performing a sex act with another woman in the car parked outside of a Wawa convenience store in Lehigh County.

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