Boners

Boner Candidates August 4, 2016

Boner Candidate #1: WE’RE IN LOVE

A man was arrested Friday for having inappropriate relations with a goat on Friday, according to the Paulding County Sheriff’s Office. Freddie Wadsworth, of Douglasville, was charged with bestiality. Deputies said they responded to a report of an indecent exposure along Peggy Meadows Way. Neighbors told deputies they saw a man performing a sexual act with a goat. Deputies later determined Wadsworth was responsible. He was arrested and booked into the Paulding County Jail.

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Boner Candidate #2: IF YOU WANT TO GAMBLE YOU NEED MONEY

A West Virginia man is facing bank robbery charges after police said he left a black jack table, robbed a bank and then returned to the casino to continue gambling. Kerry Johnson, 52, was arrested Wednesday afternoon after police said he robbed the City National Bank on Bridge Road Tuesday at about 3:30 p.m., according to a criminal complaint filed in Kanawha County Magistrate Court. The complaint said Johnson walked into the bank and handed an employee a note that said he had a bomb and a weapon and demanded they give him money. After receiving money, the complaint said Johnson left the area in a Green Mazda Miata. Detectives received an anonymous tip that the suspect was Kerry Johnson. The complaint said detectives went to his residence and located a yellow legal pad that matched the note that was handed to the teller. They also found a hat that appeared to be the one that Kelly wearing in surveillance video.

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Boner Candidate #3: A MAN HAS TO HAVE STANDARDS

A Georgia man was arrested for trashing his home after he became enraged when his wife didn’t put enough cheese in his grilled cheese sandwich, police said. James De Paola, 55, was charged Tuesday with obstructing a 911 call and damaging property after he threw his bizarre temper tantrum inside the Athens home he shared with his wife, Michele, 51, and their three children, ages 9, 12, and 14, police said. De Paola lost his cool at 2:35 p.m. when his wife served him the sandwich with two slices of cheese instead of three in the kitchen as their kids were playing in their rooms, cops said. He got right up in her face while shouting and cursing with spit shooting out of his mouth, according to a police report obtained by The Post. De Paola was yelling “in such an animated and close up fashion that spit was hitting Michele’s face,” the report states.

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