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Boner Candidates for March 10th, 2017

Boner Candidate #1: SOME OF YOU FAT GIRLS SHOULDN’T WEAR A DRESS LIKE THIS

An Illinois high school has been accused of body-shaming after a 21-slide presentation about acceptable prom attire was published online. Boylan Catholic High School’s guide says that girl’s dresses should not have necklines low enough to show cleavage, and that the skirts of the dresses should hit below the mid-thigh. Critics have taken issue with a line in the guide that suggests different standards will be applied to girls with different figures. “Some girls may wear the same dress, but due to body types, one dress may be acceptable while the other is not,” the guide reads.

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Boner Candidate #2: HA HA HA. WE ARE THE POLICE

Java Cow on Main Street is a popular spot in Park City. Most come in, grab their coffee, and leave. But on Saturday a group of three men and three women created a chaotic scene in the store. The general manager of the coffee and ice cream shop, Rebecca Williams, says it all started with a small American flag from a Fourth of July party hanging on one of their freezers. The magnet holding it on wasn’t strong enough and the flag had flipped upside down. Williams says her 15-year-old employee fixed the flag when the group pointed it out. But when he turned around, the magnet didn’t hold the flag, which fell again. Williams says one of the women asked who moved it, and the teen said he did–not knowing it had fallen again.

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Boner Candidate #3: THE POOR ‘JUST DON’T WANT HEALTH CARE’

A first-term congressman who spent three decades as a physician — and is now part of a group of Republican doctors who have a major role in replacing Obamacare – is facing backlash after saying that poor people “just don’t want health care and aren’t going to take care of themselves.” Rep. Roger Marshall, R-Kan., a member of the GOP Doctors Caucus, said comments he made to Stat News were not meant to suggest that poor people take health care for granted. The comments were published in a story last week about his burgeoning role in the fight to replace the Affordable Care Act. “Just like Jesus said, ‘The poor will always be with us,’ ” Marshall said in response to a question about Medicaid, which expanded under Obamacare to more than 30 states. “There is a group of people that just don’t want health care and aren’t going to take care of themselves.”

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