Boners

Boner Candidates for October 21, 2016

Boner Candidate #1: WELL, HE ONLY ABUSED HER A LITTLE BIT

Giants kicker Josh Brown was suspended one game by the N.F.L. after a domestic violence allegation. In newly released journal entries and emails, Brown wrote that he verbally and physically abused his wife. They have since divorced. Credit Charlie Riedel/Associated Press. In another episode raising questions about the handling of domestic violence cases, the N.F.L. on Thursday reopened its investigation of Giants kicker Josh Brown after a police file revealed vivid details of his admission that he had abused his wife leading up to an arrest in 2015.

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Boner Candidate #2: I WAS TAKING A SHORT CUT

Some students in Westchester County were scared and confused when their bus driver went the wrong way to school. “I was telling him ‘you’re supposed to make this turn and go this way,’ but he wouldn’t even listen to us,” 10-year-old Bella Rodriguez told CBS2’s Valerie Castro. She texted her mother, Sharon, saying the bus was lost. Sharon replied “What are you talking about?” Bella said “We don’t know where we are. Can you pick me up to go home?” Maria Deraffele’s daughter was also on the bus.

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Boner Candidate #3: LOOK I WAS JUST JOKING AROUND WITH THE LITTLE GUY.

A man has gone on trial accused of cruelty after he farted in a boy’s face, punching him and trying to suffocate another child. Gary McKenzie, 22, says he broke wind in front of the boy accidentally, but prosecutors say his behavior was ‘cruel and bullying’. Prosecutor Paul Abrahams said: ‘The boy said that the defendant pumped in his face. ‘It might be at a rugby club done to someone who had drunk ten pints and fallen asleep that one might think of this as horseplay. But this was a child at the time and was highly inappropriate.’

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