Boners

Boner Fight for August 17th, 2018

Boner Candidate #1: ALWAYS COVER UP YOUR MISTAKES WITH MISINFORMATION

Fox News apparently mistook singer Patti LaBelle for Aretha Franklin on Thursday, including a photo of LaBelle as part of the network’s obituary image for Franklin, who passed away earlier this morning after a battle with pancreatic cancer.At the end of an America’s Newsroom segment memorializing the late singer-songwriter, Fox News cut to a still image of Franklin, captioned “Aretha Franklin, Singer, 1942-2018,” inexplicably featuring a background photograph of LaBelle—who is not Franklin—singing for PBS in 2014. The flub was made all-the-more ironic by the fact that Franklin and LaBelle reportedly had a longstanding feud that only ended on Thursday morning when the 76-year-old legendary diva passed away. “We sincerely apologize to Aretha Franklin’s family and friends. Our intention was to honor the icon using a secondary image of her performing with Patti LaBelle in the full screen graphic, but the image of Ms. Franklin was obscured in that process, which we deeply regret,” said Jessica Santostefano, Fox News’s VP of media desk, in a statement.

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Boner Candidate #2: HALLE BERRY! JENNIFER HUDSON! POP. POP. POP.

SUFFOLK, Va. – Police responded to a report of a gunshot victim Thursday morning around 10:45 a.m. Police said the shooting that happened in the 300 block of East Washington Street started with an argument. News 3’s Rachael Cardin spoke to a witness who said he heard the two people in a local barbershop arguing over whether or not Halle Berry played or would play Aretha Franklin in a movie. Police said the fight turned physical and then one of the subjects, identified as 44-year-old Michael Jermell Hatton, produced a firearm, shooting the other man at least once outside the shop. Both men got emergency medical assessment and treatment by Suffolk Fire & Rescue personnel before being transported to local hospitals for further treatment. Franklin had previously wanted Berry to play her in an upcoming biopic, but Berry claimed she couldn’t sing and wouldn’t do the role justice, according to E News. Instead, Jennifer Hudson was tapped to play the Queen of Soul in the film.


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