Boners

Boner Fight for May 17th, 2017

Boner Candidate #1: RACIST DRUNK AT THE HAPPIEST PLACE ON EARTH

A father visiting Walt Disney World with his family is in jail, accused of child neglect, after what witnesses describe as a drunken tirade through one of the resorts. According to his arrest affidavit, Brian Keith Olmstead, 35, of Brunswick, Ohio, was using his child’s stroller to plow through crowds at Disney’s Art of Animation Resort on Sunday. They said he was using racial slurs as he pushed the stroller through. Disney resort managers said they received at least 11 complaints about Olmstead over the course of four hours. Olmstead’s wife told Orange County sheriff’s investigators they started the day at ESPN’s Wide World of Sports for a cheerleading competition.

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Boner Candidate #2: PERHAPS IT BROUGHT RELIEF TO A HELLISH COMMUTE

Last night, a display screen in Union Station—one of Washington DC’s main transit hubs—found itself moonlighting as a tiny pornographic theater. Now, Gizmodo can exclusively reveal footage of the incident, and I can assure you that, one, it’s definitely pornography, and two, I have never had a commute this stimulating. While not technicallysafe for work, this version has the most explicit moments censored: As The Washington Post reported earlier today, bystanders were left “speechless” after the graphic video began playing on a display screen inside the station. The footage appeared to come from PornHub, a popular porn website, and lasted for about three minutes, according to an anonymous bystander interviewed by the Post. It remains unclear what caused the explicit video to play in this public train station.

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