BONER CANDIDATE #1: BRAG IT UP LAMAR. WHAT A GREAT ACCOMPLISHMENT
It may not be the weirdest thing Lamar Odom has ever done, but in 2004, the NBA champ wore a prosthetic penis to pass a drug test for the upcoming Olympics in Athens. Odom, 39, makes the revelation in his new memoir, “Darkness to Light,” according to People magazine. “There was no way I was going to pass,” the former husband of Khloe Kardashian writes of the requisite drug test. “I had been smoking weed every day that summer. Panic set in.” Some online research on how to beat a drug test led him to order “a giant, rubber, black c— to arrive the next day,” he wrote.
BONER CANDIDATE #2: I’LL BET YOU DON’T EVER FORGET TO BUY HER A BIRTHDAY PRESENT AGAIN.
A woman is accused of attacking her boyfriend with a box cutter because she didn’t get the birthday she was expecting. A few hours after taking Georgia Michelle Zowacki out to dinner for her 55th birthday, her boyfriend said she became upset nobody bought her a card, cake or gift. He also said she had been drinking vodka throughout the day to celebrate. “Next thing you know, I’m getting stabbed,” the boyfriend, David Rae, told KDKA. Rae alleges Zowacki attacked him with a box cutter, putting it near his throat and threatening to kill him. “She went to my neck, she says, ‘I’m going to kill you,’” Rae explained. He said his girlfriend then slashed his arm with the weapon.
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