Boners

Boner (Rounds One and Two) for August 21st, 2018

Round One

Boner Candidate #1: UTAH COUNTY REPUBLICANS ARE Sooooooo FUNNY!

Some members of the Utah GOP State Central Committee, including the State Secretary and a Utah County GOP leader, seem to have no problem with making nazi-themed jokes inside a private Facebook page. Josh Daniels, the Utah County GOP vice-chairman, responded to a post about a planned cookout and celebration following Saturday’s state central committee meeting with a Nazi joke seemingly aimed at the organizers of Count My Vote. “Speaking of pork…we should lave a Nazi themed party with polish dogs or weenies and sauerkraut and call it ‘kraut my vote,'” wrote Daniels on the UTGOP SCC – OFFICIAL Facebook page. “Kraut my vote” is a reference to the Count My Vote petition initiative which provides an alternative path to the primary ballot for candidates outside of the traditional convention route.

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Boner Candidate #2: IF YOU HAVE 96 GRAMS OF METH ON YOUR PERSON, DON’T PASS OUT IN THE DRIVE THROUGH.

After police saw a man passed out while waiting in a Fullerton McDonald’s drive-thru, officers found and seized 96 grams of methamphetamine in his possession early Saturday. Officers spotted the man passed out while behind the wheel of the vehicle at about 2:34 a.m., police said in an Instagram post. They discovered the 96 grams of methamphetamine inside the glove compartment. There were also a number of items indicating the man was going to sell the meth, according to police. Police did not give any details about the man’s possible arrest in the post.

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Boner Candidate #3: Mom allowed 15-year-old to run pot shop in her bedroom: Cops

A 15-year-old girl in California was placed into protective custody Friday after deputies discovered she was running what they said was a marijuana business out of her bedroom. Deputies with the Merced County Sheriff’s Office served a search warrant at a home in Delhi on Friday and found a slew of drugs in addition to “loaded AK-47” inside, the department wrote on Facebook. The teen’s mother provided the girl with weed to both use and sell in her bedroom, according to investigators. Deputies say they uncovered “packaged marijuana for sale, marijuana edibles and other items associated with the sales and use of marijuana belonging to the daughter.”

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Round Two:

Boner Candidate #1: WE’RE PATRIOTIC BUT PLEASE BRING BACK OUR FLAG.

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Boner Candidate #2: THE LOGICAL WAY TO SOLVE A HEATED ARGUMENT.

A 13-year-old teen in Newport News has been arrested after an argument with a 14-year-old. The incident allegedly left the older of the two with third degree burns to 15 percent of his body. Police said the incident happened around 4 p.m. at Peterson’s Yacht Basin located at the intersection of Blair Avenue and Walnut Avenue. Police arrived at the assault call to find the 14-year-old suffering from wounds to his torso and one of his arms. The two teens allegedly got into an argument about who was going to light charcoal on the grill. According to police, this is when the argument turned physical and the 13-year-old doused the 14-year-old with lighter fluid and ignited his clothing.

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Boner Candidate #3: YOU HAVE USED MY CHILD FOR HATE SPEECH.

A mother of a transgender boy is speaking out after her son’s story was used to foment transphobia. Two years ago, Vanessa Nichols’s son appeared in an episode of My Trans Life, a show that airs on Barcroft TV’s YouTube channel. In the video, Vanessa and her son talk about growing up transgender. “I think I’m gonna take some medicine so that I can kinda like transform into a boy, get surgery,” the then 7-year-old said in the video. He’s now living as a boy. The video got noticed by California political gadfly Austin Bennett. Earlier this year, Bennett ran a write-in campaign in the primary for a state senate seat, getting just 0.3% of the vote.

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