Boners

Boner (Round One) for July 31st, 2017

Boner Candidate #1: IT WAS ‘TAKE YOUR DAUGHTER TO WORK’ DAY

A Florida mother was arrested on charges of bringing her 10-year-old along during an armed robbery, which turned into a police car chase and involved a shooting, news reports state. Christina R. Gaud, 30, was the driver during the Friday night convenience store robbery and stayed in the car while 33-year-old Rodney Snow went inside to rob the store, the Orlando Sentinel reported. When Marion County Sheriff’s Office deputies responded, the duo drove off before crashing. Deputies told the Orlando Sentinel that Snow ran into the woods and shot himself.  He is in critical condition, officials told the Orlando Sentinel.

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Boner Candidate #2: MAYBE THE SHIRT IS MORE REPRESENTATIVE THAN YOU THINK

Washington, DC police are in full damage control after a police cop was photographed wearing a racist t-shirt while on duty. Officer Vincent Altiere was photographed in DC Superior Court – while on duty – wearing a shirt with a white supremacist “Celtic cross” and a grim reaper sporting a badge for the Metropolitan Police Department of Washington, DC, The Washington Post reports. “The shirt displays a “sun cross” (replacing the letter “O” of “PowerShift”), a well-known and notorious white supremacist symbol adopted by the Ku Klux Klan and other white supremacist hate groups,” claim Law 4 Black Lives activists who want the officer fired. “Immediately below is the image of the Grim Reaper, a personification of death in the form of a hooded skeleton, holding an assault rifle and a Metropolitan Police Department badge.” Police Chief Peter Newsham said, “this is disgraceful and does not represent the hard working and committed officers of the Seventh District.

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Boner Candidate #3: THE MOOCH IS REALLY A DOUCHE

But that’s exactly what Deidre Scaramucci, nee Ball, did when she filed for divorce from her husband of three years, Anthony Scaramucci, the vulgar new White House Communications Director, while she was full with child. The New York Post—which must have some kind of line to Ball’s people—reports that Deidre filed for divorce on July 6 in Nassau County Supreme Court. Sources say the couple separated “five or six months ago.” Deidre gave birth to a baby boy, James, on Monday, while her 53-year-old husband was in West Virginia with President Trump during that disastrous Boy Scouts Jamboree speech.

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