Boner of the Day

Boner Candidate Preview August 22, 2016

Boner Preview #1: GO BACK TO AFRICA

Unidentified Florida woman yelling at black neighbors — (screen grab) In a video that is attracting lots of attention on social media, a bikini-clad Tallahassee mom is seen screaming at black teens on the street, telling them they should have “stayed in Africa,” before going a rant about late civil rights leader Martin Luther King Jr. According to the Express, the unidentified and apparently drunken woman was recorded back in March, smoking a cigarette and screaming obscenities at the passing black teens who caught it all on video.

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Boner Preview #2: WHAT DO YOU MEAN I CAN’T PLAY THROUGH?

A 61-year-old man was taken to jail Saturday night after he stabbed another man on a Payson golf course. (Photo: MGN) (KUTV) A man was taken to Utah County Jail Saturday night after a fight broke out among golfers in Payson. According to Lieutenant Bill Wright with Payson Police, around 8:20 p.m. Saturday night a group of four golfers were playing ahead of a 61-year-old Lee Johnson and his his wife. The man and woman thought that the group was going too slow and wanted to play through, but the group did not want them too.

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Boner Preview #3: WHO IS GOING TO STOP US?

The cost of saving your child’s life has gotten a lot more expensive. Parents getting ready for back-to-school season have another item to toss in the basket along with Trapper Keepers and boxes of pencils — and they’re facing sticker shock at the latest price increase. Doctors and patients say the Mylan pharmaceutical company has jacked up the prices for an EpiPen — the portable device that can stop a potentially life-threatening allergic reaction — from around $100 in 2008 to $500 and up today. That’s a hike of over 400 percent.

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Boner Preview #4: I MISSED THE LAST BUS

A woman faces charges this morning after police say she stole a running ambulance parked outside a hospital and drove home after she was discharged. Lisa Carr, 43, was taken into custody several minutes later after a short, low speed pursuit. “Mrs. Carr stated that she took the vehicle because she missed the last bus,” police wrote in a sworn affidavit filed in Hamilton County Municipal Court.

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Boner Preview #5: THIS IS JUST ALL KINDS OF WRONG

Typically, the miracle of birth is a very private affair, involving only the mother, father, and maybe a handful of doctors. Simone Thurbur is not a very typical person. Thurbur is a therapist and mother of four, but she’s probably best known for having more people than the entire population of California and New York City combined watch her give birth. In an interview conducted by Haley Goldberg for SELF, Thurbur explained the reasoning behind the odd birthing choice. In 2012, Thurbur gave birth to her fourth child in a stream, completely unassisted. According to the interview, she had felt inspired by a video of Russian women giving birth in the Black Sea.

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Boner Preview #6: THEY WANT ME TO GO TO A COTTAGE; A COTTAGE!

Misuse of the emergency number could ‘tie up police resources which could impact the safety of others in the community who are in real need of assistance,’ says OPP constable. (Getty Images) A Mississauga teenager was cautioned by the Ontario Provincial Police after she called 911 last Tuesday to complain that her parents “forced her” to go on vacation with them at a rental cottage east of Toronto in Trent Hills. “This appeared to be a case of a teenager being a teenager,” Northumberland OPP Const. Steve Bates told CBC News. “Although she perceived this as a real issue, it was not an appropriate use of 911.”

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