Boners

Boner Candidates July 26, 2016

Boner Candidate #1: IF MY PRIVATE PARTS ARE COVERED, THEY ARE IN A PRIVATE PLACE.

A man admitted he surreptitiously took cellphone video up a woman’s skirt while she shopped at a grocery store, but a Georgia court says he didn’t break the law. The Georgia Court of Appeals this month tossed out the conviction of former grocery store employee Brandon Lee Gary, who recorded the videos. The majority opinion says Gary’s behavior, known as “upskirting,” was reprehensible but doesn’t violate Georgia’s invasion of privacy law because it happened in a place that’s open to the public. That law prohibits recording a person without consent “in any private place and out of public view.” A dissenting opinion says the law should be interpreted to mean that a person’s covered private parts are in fact a private place. Some lawmakers are considering a legislative fix.

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Boner Candidate #2: NO SPEAK-O, NO TEACH-O.

A non-Spanish-speaking teacher is suing her employer for rejecting her from a job that required her to teach the language. Tracy Rosner, a third-grade teacher at Coral Reef Elementary in Palmetto Bay, Florida, applied to teach an extended foreign language track, which required teaching one hour of a foreign language daily, the Miami New Times reported. But the district required that those taught Spanish in the extended foreign language track speak Spanish as well, and Rosner didn’t. She was turned down for the job. In response, Rosner filed a federal lawsuit last week in the Southern District of Florida, alleging that the district’s policy of only hiring Spanish speakers was discriminatory against non-Spanish speakers in Florida’s Miami-Dade County, the New Times reported.

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Boner Candidate #3: THIS REALLY KEEPS THE KIDS IN LINE

Authorities in Florida say four adults have been arrested for using a stun gun to discipline children living in their home. The Polk County Sheriff’s Office said in news release that 22-year-old Eduardo Vazquez and 22-year-old William Torres-Morales were arrested Thursday on aggravated child abuse and other charges. The report says the suspects admitted using a stun gun to discipline the children, including instances when male children failed to do a certain number of pushups. The statement indicated seven children had burns consistent with stun-gun injuries. Deputies say the suspects’ girlfriends, 33-year-old Elizabeth Tarvin and 32-year-old Veronica Sanchez, knew about the abuse but didn’t stop it. The women face charges of negligent child abuse and failure to report child abuse. It’s unclear whether the suspects have attorneys.

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