Boners

Boner Fight for July 21st, 2017

Boner Candidate #1: YOU RUINED MY REPUTATION

A California teacher who was jailed for having sex with a 16-year-old student — is now suing him for damaging her reputation, according to a report. Tara Stumph, 36, a married former Arroyo Grande High School teacher, was sentenced to 180 days in the slammer for having sex with a person under 18. But the former cooking teacher came out swinging by filing a counterclaim, claiming the victim defamed her “to various classmates, family and other members of the community,” The Tribune of San Luis Obispo reported. Stumph and her former employer, the Lucia Mar school district, were named as defendants in a lawsuit by the victim’s family. The boy’s family and the district are expected to enter a binding mediation process with Santa Barbara mediator Henry Bongiovi, the paper reported. Stumph’s teaching license was pulled after her conviction, but she will not have to register as a sex offender when she is released from San Luis Obispo County Jail.

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Boner Candidate #2: THIS IS GONNA BE DANGEROUS

The pregnant Minnesota woman who fatally shot her boyfriend during a fame-seeking YouTube stunt gone awry pleaded for rescuers to rush to his aid, a newly released transcript of the 911 call revealed. “We were doing a YouTube video, and it went wrong,” Monalisa Perez, 19, told a 911 dispatcher moments after she shot 22-year-old Pedro Ruiz in the chest with his .50-caliber handgun on June 26, the Star-Tribune reported. “Please hurry up. … My God, hurry up, please!” Perez begged as she detailed the fatal stunt to the dispatcher, saying “it’s all on recording.” Perez, according to the news outlet, frantically said: “He’s gonna’ die…Oh, my God, he’s dead! He looks like he’s dying, ma’am. He’s all blue. Please hurry up, ma’am. … He’s dying. He’s dying!”

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