Boners

Boner Fight for June 21st, 2018

Boner Candidate #1: IT GIVES ME A NATURAL GLOW

A STOMACH-churning video shows a woman drinking a cup of her dog’s fresh urine while claiming it has cured her acne. American animal lover Lynn Lew, whose face is caked in heavy make up during the clip, says that lapping up her mutt’s warm body waste had helped give her skin a natural glow. The woman chugs down the dog’s frothy pee in the vile footage. In the disgusting footage, she also incorrectly claims that drinking canine body fluids can help cure cancer. She said: “Many of you have asked me how I always look so good, how my makeup always looks so perfect, or how I always have this natural glow.”

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Boner Candidate #2: SORRY SIR. MY CARD HAS BEEN DECLINED.

Authorities say an Arkansas thief got his just deserts when he tried to pay for a meal using the waitress’s stolen credit card. Police spokesman Lt. David De Foor said in a news release that officers arrested 21-year-old Shamon West on Tuesday at Shannon’s Restaurant in Pine Bluff. He says that “having no desire to pay for the fellow’s meal,” waitress Flora Lunsford called to report that the man had tried paying for his meal with her stolen credit card. De Foor says officers found other items on West that had been in Lunsford’s purse when it was stolen from her car Sunday at a nearby gas station while she was inside, including her Social Security card and driver’s license.

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