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Boner Fight for November 27th, 2017

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Boner Candidate #1: I DON’T BELIEVE IN SCIENCE

UPDATE: Hughes has had to postpone his planned launch for the time being, The Washington Post reported Friday. Hughes said he was unable to obtain the required permits to launch on public land, but now plans for it to take place sometime next week on private property.

PREVIOUSLY: A self-taught rocket engineer who claims he believes the earth is flat plans to launch himself nearly 2,000 feet in the air on a homemade steam rocket this Saturday. “Mad” Mike Hughes, a 61-year-old limo driver, told The Associated Press that he’ll be lifting off over the California ghost town of Amboy, traveling about a mile at 500 mph, reaching 1,800 feet in altitude and then exiting via parachute. The amateur rocket scientist has been making national headlines not just for the stunt, but for his self-professed bizarre attitude toward science, given the circumstances. For one thing, his primary sponsor in the endeavor is reportedly a group called Research Flat Earth. Photos that Hughes has posted on Facebook show the words “RESEARCH FLAT EARTH” painted in large letters across the bright red rocket’s side.

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Boner Candidate #2: DRUNK, NAKED DRIVING.

Police in Washington state allege that a drunk, naked man crashed a car on Wednesday while he was having sex at the wheel with a woman whose baby was in the backseat. The driver missed a curve as he was being straddled by the 3-month-old infant’s naked mother, per multiple reports. He ended up plowing the vehicle into a tree on Route 7 near La Grande in Pierce County at around 6 p.m. on Wednesday. The couple were “scrambling” to get dressed as police arrived at the scene, Washington State Trooper Brooke Bova told The Independent. The baby had been securely strapped into a carseat and was not injured. The woman suffered a broken pelvis and the man sustained a broken wrist. It’s not clear whether the mother, who was also reportedly drunk, will face any charges. HuffPost has reached out to police for further information.

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