ROUND ONE
Boner Candidate #1: YOUR ELECTED LEADERS CARE ABOUT YOU…UNLESS YOU HAVE DIABETES.
On Thursday, all four of Utah’s representatives in the House voted against the bill that would cap the price of insulin.
Boner Candidate #2: OH, THERE’S THAT KNIFE. I WONDERED WHERE I PUT THAT.
TSA at a Boston airport recently found a 10-inch butcher knife in a car seat that was occupied by a child.
Boner Candidate #3: HIS STUDENTS SHOULD DO AS HE SAYS NOT AS HE DOES.
A Florida driving instructor was recently pulled over and arrested for a DUI while driving a vehicle made for student drivers.
ROUND TWO
Boner Candidate #1: THIS SEEMS LIKE A TOUGH WAY TO MAKE A LIVING.
Police discovered that 90-year-old man in Berlin has voluntarily received about 90 COVID-19 vaccinations in order to sell the completed vaccine cards to those wanting to remain unvaccinated.
Boner Candidate #2: ONCE AGAIN, I’D LIKE TO CONGRATULATE MYSELF FOR NOT WATCHING OR CARING ABOUT THE GRAMMY AWARDS.
Although there have been several allegations of sexual misconduct made against him, Louis CK still managed to win a Grammy for his album ‘Sincerely Louis CK’.
Boner Candidate #3: I WAS THERE WHEN THE FIRES STARTED BUT I DIDN’T DO IT.
A 22-year-old security guard at a business complex in Cottonwood Heights has been arrested after calling in a false bomb threat and starting fires at her workplace over a number of days.
