ROUND ONE
Boner Candidate #1: IS MY BEER OKAY?
A Florida man who was walking out of a convenience store was hit by a car that ran into the building and security footage caught him asking if the beer he had just purchased is okay.
Boner Candidate #2: I DON’T CARE WHAT YOUR PREFERRED NAME IS. IN THIS CLASS YOU WILL BE ‘MISS’.
A middle school teacher in Kansas is suing her school district after she was disciplined for refusing to use a student’s preferred name and pronouns in class.
Boner Candidate #3: HE HAD A POWERFUL THIRST.
A Wisconsin man was arrested after he entered the lobby of a police station and refused to leave, drinking a beer and threatening to kill police officers.
ROUND TWO
Boner Candidate #1: A CROTCHLESS CAT SUIT? REALLY?
Kim Kardashian recently introduced a $108 crotchless cat suit to her shapewear line, ‘Skims’.
Boner Candidate #2: I NEED A NEW BUTT.
An assistant principle in Mississippi was fired after he read a children’s book called “I Need a New Butt” to a Zoom class of second-graders.
Boner Candidate #3: AHHH..THE ‘RIGHT GUARD’ HIGH.
A Florida woman was arrested and charged with a DUI after she was pulled over for erratic driving. Police found that she was intoxicated because she had been huffing deodorant spray.
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