Boners

Boner (Round One and Two) for May 30th, 2018

Round One

Boner Candidate #1: PROFITING FROM TRAGEDY.

A still from the video game Active Shooter Revived Games/ACID Parents, police and gamers alike are denouncing an upcoming video game that allows players to simulate a school shooting, saying the publisher wants to make money off the “glamorization of tragedies” impacting students and teachers across the country. Ryan Petty, whose 14-year-old daughter, Alaina, was killed during the Feb. 14 massacre at Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida, told the Miami Herald that the planned June 6 release of Active Shooter should be canceled. The game, developed by Revived Games, will allow players to act as a SWAT team member or an active shooter on a digital distribution platform called Steam, operated by Washington-based Valve. Revived doesn’t provide any contact information on its website, but it lists other controversial titles including Tyde Pod Challenge and White Power: Pure Voltage.

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Boner Candidate #2: I WASHED HIS FEET SO HE COULD EAT.

An Arkansas mom says workers at a local IHOP refused to allow her son — who was born without arms — to have breakfast at the restaurant because he eats with his feet. Alexis Bancroft, 25, told local outlet KARK that her 3-year-old boy, William, learned in therapy to eat by sitting on a table and using his feet. But when Bancroft and her husband took their kids to an IHOP in Hot Springs for a pancake breakfast Saturday, the location’s general manager was not happy with the eating technique. She told the family that William couldn’t touch the syrup container because of a health department regulation, Bancroft recalled. “When we got there, I carried him in, took him to the bathroom and washed his feet so he could eat,” Bancroft said. “I asked her, ‘Do you ask all of your customers if they washed their hands before they touch [the syrup containers]?”

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Boner Candidate #3: LADIES; THIS IS ALL ABOUT EMPOWERMENT.

A Las Vegas teacher accused of threatening to open fire at a concert allegedly aspired to empower women to become serial killers. Leslie McGourty, a 48-year-old physics teacher, was arrested earlier this month on suspicion of making a threat to commit an act of terrorism, the Las Vegas Review Journal reported. Police released a series of text messages from the Bonanza High School educator who wrote to a friend that she wanted to be “remembered” and planned to “poke a lot of holes in a lot of people” during a May 19 concert in downtown Las Vegas. “A perfect plan with my favorite song surrounded by a bunch of f–ked up misfits like I am,” she reportedly wrote. “Imagine knowing exactly the moment that you’re going to die. I know exactly that your favorite song will be playing. By your favorite band. It’s just too perfect.”

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Round Two

Boner Candidate #1: I DID THIS AS A SAFETY MEASURE.

A firefighter in Texas admitted to hiding a camera inside a fake smoke detector in his ex-girlfriend’s bathroom, police said. Edgar Benito Aguilar, a 31-year-old firefighter in Fort Worth, was arrested earlier this month after the woman told police she found the camera inside a replica smoke detector in her bathroom that was facing her shower, the Dallas Morning News reports. The woman told police in March she thought Aguilar — the father of her son — was responsible for installing it there. He had regular access to the woman’s home since they shared custody of the boy, according to an Arlington police affidavit. The woman accused Aguilar of ongoing harassment dating back years, saying there were several incidents that made her believe he was somehow watching her. The woman also told investigators she believed Aguilar was behind some missing personal items from her home, according to the affidavit.

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Boner Candidate #2: IT’S PORN; PORN I TELL YOU.

Republican Rep. Diane Black of Tennessee recently cited pornography, along with the deterioration of the family and violent movies, as a contributing factor to gun violence in schools. Black made the remarks during a listening session with local pastors last week, according to audio obtained by HuffPost and posted Tuesday. “Why do we see kids being so violent? What’s out there? What makes them do that?” Black said. “Because, as a nurse, I go back to root cause. And I think it’s a couple things,” Black said, listing off deterioration of the family and violent movies, before mentioning pornography. “Pornography. It’s available. It’s available on the shelf when you walk in the grocery store. Yeah, you have to reach up to get it, but there’s pornography there,” Black says in the audio. “All of this is available without parental guidance.”

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Boner Candidate #3: GRAVEYARD SWASTIKA SPREE.

An Illinois man is facing hate crime charges after spray-painting roughly 200 graves with swastikas, court records show. Timothy V. McLean, 34, of Glen Carbon, was charged with several counts of hate crimes, as well as vandalism and property crimes, after hundreds of swastikas were found on headstones and grave markers at Sunset Hill Cemetery early Saturday, the Belleville News-Democrat reports. Investigators have not released a motive for the defaced graves at the nondenominational cemetery. Two teams of groundskeepers used power washers Saturday and Sunday to remove most of the paint on the desecrated stones and markers, the cemetery’s family service manager told the newspaper.

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