Boners

Boner (Round One) for June 5th, 2017

Boner Candidate #1: I COULDN’T AFFORD IKEA

A Michigan woman is accused of stealing a handmade bench, flowers and other objects from local cemeteries that were later used to decorate her home. Lisa Corcoran of Vienna Township was arraigned Wednesday on a larceny charge. Authorities say more than 100 items were taken earlier this year from 24 gravesites at two cemeteries. Genesee County Sheriff Robert Pickell described the thefts Thursday to reporters as a “new low” and said “to steal from the dead is an unimaginable act that defies description.”

Read More

Boner Candidate #2: YIKES! BED BUGS!

A Maine man’s stunt shuttered the Augusta city hall after he slammed a container of bedbugs onto a counter, spilling dozens of them into the office, according to a report. “He whippped out a cup and slammed it onto the counter, and bam, off they flew, maybe 100 of them,” City manager William Bridgeo told the Kennebec Journal. When the man arrived at the Augusta City Center, he went to the General Assistance office where he asked for a form to request aid. After they told him he didn’t qualify, he unleashed the pests, most of them landing on the counter, the news outlet reported. At least one bug landed on a city employee. They started to spread quickly, but finance director and assistant city manager Ralph S. Pierre grabbed some Windex and used the cleaner in an attempt to immobilize the bugs.

Read More

Boner Candidate #3: CATCH ME IF YOU CAN

An alleged bike thief and robbery suspect was arrested after cops say he taunted them during a rambling Facebook Live video — daring police in Idaho to catch him, saying “like my new wheels, guys?” Jason Granger provided a first-person perspective of his escape in the 22-minute video posted Thursday as he pedaled down Interstate 84 after police in Mountain Home were called to a Walmart to check on a man making threats to a customer, the Idaho Statesman reported. “Yup, all I have to say is f–k you, too, f–king Idaho, Granger said. “I’m tired of your s–t, too. You f—-king bitch-ass cops can’t catch me.” Granger — who at times gave shout-outs to friends and yelled at animals during his frantic ride — also alluded to the bike he allegedly stole from a church, according to the video.

Read More

[polldaddy poll=9762052]

To Top