Boners

Boner (Round One) for May 25th, 2017

Boner Candidate #1: YOU BROKE MY GLASSES

The Republican candidate in a hotly contested special House election in Montana was charged with assaulting a journalist on Wednesday at what was to be a final rally in Bozeman on the eve of the vote. The attack brought police officers to the event and sent the reporter to the hospital for X-rays. In a statement late Wednesday, the office of the Gallatin County sheriff, Brian Gootkin, said there was enough evidence to charge the candidate, Greg Gianforte, with misdemeanor assault. Mr. Gianforte, the Republican candidate for the state’s lone House seat, is scheduled to appear in court before June 7.

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Boner Candidate #2: THE CLASS ROOM CLASH

These two need to take a class on diplomacy. A Georgia middle school science teacher and a paraprofessional got into a vicious classroom brawl — in front of horrified students who captured the fight on video. The two women, who have not been identified, started throwing punches at one another May 19 at Stone Mountain Middle School, which is northeast of downtown Atlanta, according to CBS46. “From what I think I know the teachers were arguing about a teacher, a male teacher, and they started arguing and it went on for about three to five minutes,” a student told the network. “Everyone was screaming like stop, stop, stop.”

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Boner Candidate #3: RULES ARE RULES CANCER GIRL

A western South Dakota high school won’t allow a student who has brain cancer to walk at graduation because she is six credits short of being able to officially graduate. The Rapid City Journal reports 17-year-old Meredith Erck wasn’t sure whether she would live to see graduation day. The Central High School student had colon cancer before she was diagnosed with brain cancer in 2015. Between surgeries and recovery, she couldn’t complete all of her classes on time.

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