Boners

Boner (Round One) for October 30th, 2017

Boner Candidate #1: WELL SHE MAYBE A LITTLE HEAVY BUT SHE HAS A PRETTY FACE

A Quebec judge will be subject to an official complaint over comments he made during a sexual assault trial suggesting the teenage complainant was “flattered” by the accuser’s attention. Cab driver Carlo Figaro, 49, was accused of forcibly kissing and licking the face of a 17-year-old girl who was his passenger and touching her breasts and genitals over her clothes. Figaro was found guilty in May and has not yet been sentenced. He is appealing the conviction. According to Le Journal de Montreal, during the trial Judge Jean-Paul Braun remarked, “It can be said that she is a little overweight, but she has a pretty face huh?” He also suggested the victim may have been “flattered” because “it is perhaps the first time that he is interested in her.” He described the non-consensual kiss as an “acceptable gesture.”

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Boner Candidate #2: PUT ME DOWN YOU WEIRDO.

A youngster on holiday with her friend was tipped out of her sunbed during a poolside row with pensioners. Jenna Deacon and Eilidh Robertson, 19, dared to take a sunbed that had been ‘reserved’ with a towel in the Portuguese resort of Albufeira. The girls, from Forfar in Angus, try to stifle their laughter as they experience the wrath of a furious British couple who reclaimed the bed by tipping Eilidh off it. Hilarious moment angry OAP tips holidaymaker off her sunbed. The dispute ended with the man, holding an ice cream, lifting up one end of the sunbed, forcing Eilidh to slide off, as she exclaims: ‘Put me down you f****** weirdo!’ Jenna’s clip filmed earlier this month, begins with the Englishwoman speaking to the girls appearing to claim it is her sun lounger. Eilidh can be heard arguing with the woman saying the bed has been ‘sitting there all morning’. The annoyed tourist, seen wearing a vest and shorts, then calls over a man believed to be her husband, stating: ‘She’s taken my bed Paul’.

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Boner Candidate #3: THE BOORISH SPORTS BROADCASTER

A Texas school district apologized Friday after a high school football broadcaster repeatedly used a racial slur when referring to African-American players on the opposing team. The Cleburne Independent School District apologized for online audio comments made last week in a matchup between Cleburne High School and Seguin High School in Arlington, according to Leslie Johnston, spokeswoman for the Arlington Independent School District. Seguin is in Arlington, while the other school is in Cleburne, a city just south of Fort Worth. The game was broadcast by an online site that covers Cleburne High School contests but isn’t affiliated with the school district, school officials said. Cleburne officials told Arlington administrators that the broadcaster will no longer call games, Johnston said. “We support that decision,” Johnston said in an email, adding that the schools believe “this is not a time for divisiveness, and we appreciate CISD taking steps to promote unity and good sportsmanship.”

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