Boners

Boner (Round Two) for April 26th, 2017

Boner Candidate #1: PUT HIM IN A BOX FULL OF ANTS

Police in Alabama say a man is charged with abuse after allegedly locking two young children inside a trash bin container where authorities found them covered in ants. A statement issued Monday by Dothan police says 25-year-old Lorenzo McCullough is being held without bond. Police say a 2-year-old and a 4-year-old were found early Sunday inside a brick structure that contained trash bins. The children were covered by ants, and both were taken to a hospital.

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Boner Candidate #2: HE WAS NOT A SHARP SHOOTER AFTER ALL

This is the gruesome moment a bungling sharpshooter blasts a woman’s fingers as he tries to hit a cigarette in her hand. Horrifying footage shows the relaxed “assistant” holding a lit cig between her digits as a target for his rifle. But the William Tell wannabe’s .22 pellet, fired from close range, appears to hit the woman’s fingers and leaves her screaming and covered in blood. The 46-second-clip is thought to have been filmed near Guisborough, North Yorkshire — a small town in northwest England — and was uploaded to Facebook on Sunday by user Anth Walls with the caption: “What a crank.”

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Boner Candidate #3: THE WILDFIRE JUST MADE ME A LITTLE CRAZY

As a massive wildfire raged nearby and deputies worked to evacuate residents, Joshua Benz picked a most “Florida Man” way to snort cocaine: by doing so right in front of a patrol car, police said. Benz, 25, a Naples resident, motioned for a deputy to stop his unmarked patrol car Friday night, according to the Naples Daily News. When the car stopped, Benz took a long snort from a clear bag that contained cocaine, police said. At that point, police said, Benz turned around with his hands behind his back, WBBH reported.

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