Boner of the Day

Boner (Round Two) for September 27th, 2017

Boner Candidate #1: I NEED THE “CONE OF SILENCE”

The Environmental Protection Agency is spending nearly $25,000 to build a soundproof communications booth in Administrator Scott Pruitt’s office, according to media reports. The Washington Post first reported details of the contract on Tuesday evening, which will cost the government $24,570. The “privacy booth” will be installed by Oct. 9, so Pruitt can have “a secured communication area in the administrator’s office so secured calls can be received and made,” EPA spokeswoman Liz Bowman told the Post in a statement. “Federal agencies need to have one of these so that secured communications, not subject to hacking from the outside, can be held,” Bowman continued. “This is something which a number, if not all, cabinet offices have and EPA needs to have updated.”

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Boner Candidate #2: BUST THE GUY IN THE T-SHIRT

A Sterling man, who was allegedly under the influence when officers pulled him over Saturday night, was wearing a T-shirt that matched his DUI charge. “Beer + Beer = Shenanigans,” reads the green tee Nathan Corey, 38, was wearing when his mug shot was taken. A trooper spotted Corey striking the sidewalk on Main Street in Danielson and breaking other traffic laws about 9:50 p.m. Saturday, police said. Corey failed sobriety tests and troopers found marijuana, drug paraphernalia and a 12-inch machete inside his vehicle, police said.

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Boner Candidate #3: BEAT DOWN IN THE EMPATHY TENT.

So much for empathy. Members of opposing political groups clashed Tuesday inside a so-called “empathy tent” on the campus of the University of California, Berkeley. At least four people were arrested, police said. The empathy tent was reportedly in place to offer protesters a calm place to unwind amid the choas around them. But the tent ultimately offered little respite — and nearly toppled during clashes between conservative students and leftist activists, the Los Angeles Times reported. “It’s tough, but we do what we can to foster dialogue,” said Edwin Fulch, who reportedly used the tent for talks about the virtues of meditation and the Occupy Wall Street movement.

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