Boners

Boner of the Day for April 11th, 2023

Boner Candidate #1: MR. GU’S CHICKEN DEATH REVENGE

A man by the name Mr. Gu was sentenced to prison for driving his neighbors chickens to trample each other to death. To continue a neighborly feud Mr. Gu used a flashlight to disturb them and as they were trying to flee the 500 chickens trampled each other. There were two events in which Mr. Gu put the lives of these chickens into his own hands. Over the two offences 1,100 chickens were killed. The Hengyang court sentenced Mr. Gu to six months in prison with one year of probation.

via New York Post

Boner Candidate #2: YOU KNOW HOW KIDS ARE, ALL THEY’LL FOCUS ON IS THE SEX STUFF

A graphic novel recounting Anne Frank’s Diary was removed from Florida high school. The action was fueled by the leader of Moms for Liberty, which was seconded by the principal, therefore this rendition of Anne Frank’s Diary was taken out of Vero Beach High School. The issue they had was regarding a scene where the protagonist is walking in an enchanted park lined with female nude statues. She then later propose the idea of her and her friend showing their breasts to each other. This book was only checked out twice before Moms for Liberty decided to get involved. According to the American Library Association last year, in the U.S., there were 1,200 demands to censor library books. This is an influx from the past 20 years.

via Fox 13 Now

Boner Candidate #3: HE’S NOT A GOD, HE’S BOeBERT’S KID

Rep. Lauren Boebert is being accused of covering up details of a car crash that involved her son, Tyler Boebert, and his friend. The friend, Noble D’Amato,¬† was injured during the event and is obviously not a fan of how she is down playing the situation. Said crash effected D’Amato’s welding career path as it severely lacerated his hand. Congresswoman Lauren Boebert’s statement seemed to conveniently omitted the injury involved. These lies have led to only D’Amato being charged for drug possession regarding unprescribed¬† Xanax pill and a grinder that were found on the scene. The congresswoman’s son was given the conservative ticket of careless driving, this later became a simple “defective vehicle for headlights” charge. The punishment Tyler Boebert got was the participation of a drivers awareness program. D’Amato’s opinion on the matter can be summed up in one quote “If I did what he did, I’d still be in jail.”

 

via MSN

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