Boner Candidate #1: Suit settled alleging clowns attacked teen with sex toys at haunted house
The case of two people dressed as clowns accused of attacking a teenage girl and her mother with vibrating sex toys in the parking lot of a Montgomery haunted house has been settled out of court, according to Kane County court records. The terms of the settlement were not disclosed, and the haunted house operators did not admit to any wrongdoing.
Boner Candidate #2: Finally found: Parents of 2-year-old S. Ogden girl have some explaining to do
South Ogden police say that nearly 11 hours after officers first found a 2-year-old girl wandering down a dark street early Tuesday morning in her pajamas, her parents made contact with them. Police Lt. Dwight Ruth said that due to the long period of the time the girl apparently had been on her own without her parents’ knowledge, detectives would be looking carefully into the case.
Boner Candidate #3: Florida’s First Lady Apologizes for Reading About Miami Prostitutes to Fifth-Grade Class
Unlike her husband, Gov. Rick Scott, Florida’s first lady, Ann Scott, has mostly avoided controversy and the headlines. Unfortunately, an embarrassing mixup led the low-key first lady to read a passage from a book to fifth-graders that described Miami’s Biscayne Boulevard in the ’60s, complete with descriptions of prostitutes, porno theaters, and drug addicts.
Boner Candidate #4: This person actually stole a ring off a dead woman’s finger
Authorities in Texas said Monday they have received several tips, but made no arrests in the case of a woman who stole a $10 ring off the finger of a dead woman as her body lay in an open casket. Odessa Police said the theft occurred on Friday at the Sunset Funeral Home. The deceased victim was 88-year-old Lois Hicks, who had passed away the day before.
Boner Candidate #5: Man Goes to the Dentist to Have Four Teeth Removed. He Wakes Up to an Unexpected Nightmare.
An Indiana man woke up to an unexpected nightmare last month during a trip to the dentist’s office. Donny Grigsby says he went to White River Dental in Columbus, Indiana, to have four teeth removed. But instead, the doctor pulled all of his teeth, WRTV-TV reported.
Boner Candidate #6: Hundreds Sue Tennessee Cemetery After Relatives’ Bodies Go Missing
