Boners

Boner Candidates September 16, 2016

Boner Candidate #1: THE ROBBER WHO COULDN’T SHOOT STRAIGHT

Police responding to a report of gunshots say their suspect ended up in a Salt Lake City hospital, apparently having accidentally shot himself in the leg. Salt Lake City police Detective Richard Chipping said Thursday that details were still being developed, but it appeared the suspect had earlier been involved in an attempted robbery in th area of 2100 South and 200 East. He allegedly tried to intimidate his would-be victims by firing several times into the air — then wounded himself when the pistol discharged as he returned it to his holster. University of Utah police had made a traffic stop about 12:15 a.m. Thursday near 100 South and 1100 East, discovering the wounded man inside the car. SLCPD officers soon arrived, arresting a second, 21-year-old man in the car on unrelated felony warrants, while his companion went by ambulance to the hospital.

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Boner Candidate #2: MS. BONNER, YOU ARE A BONER

An Evansville mother was arrested after police and school officials said she threatened to blow up Washington Middle School earlier this week. Authorities identified the woman as Billie Jo Bonner, 39. She was arrested on Tuesday. According to the probable cause affidavit against her, Bonner was upset that morning because her son was not being allowed to return to Washington Middle School until she met with school officials. Such a meeting was scheduled for later Tuesday afternoon, but Bonner had conveyed to her parent advocate that if the her son was not allowed back into the school, she would “blow up (the school),” investigators wrote in the affidavit.

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Boner Candidate #3: 7 YEARS OLD, 4 FEET TALL, LESS THAN 50 POUNDS.

Kaylb’s life was upended as a result of the incident. His mom, Tomesha Primm, took him out of school out of fear for his safety. She said he started having nightmares and wetting the bed. Now the family has filed a lawsuit in hopes that the school district will better train its police officers to work with kids and provide compensatory damages. “To put it simply, [Kaylb] was terrified. School is supposed to be a safe place for kids where they can go and learn to be themselves and learn more generally,” said Anthony Rothert, legal director of the Missouri ACLU. “It quite understandably made him feel unsafe and afraid to return.” The lawsuit, which names Kansas City Public Schools as well as a school principal and police officer as defendants, is based in part on the police officer’s incident report. According to the police officer’s account, the child had been “out of control in his classroom and refused to follow my directions.” Still, the officer violated Kaylb’s right to be free from unreasonable seizures and excessive force, according to the lawsuit.

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