Boner Candidate #1: HEY 911…WANNA FOOL AROUND?
A Wisconsin man with a well-documented history of making frivolous calls to the police was apparently in the mood for love when cops say he repeatedly called 911, asking dispatchers to ‘fool around’ and ‘spend quality time’ with him. Benjamin Duddles, 47, from Waukesha, was arrested last week on misdemeanor counts related to drug possession and unlawful phone use stemming from his communications with 911 dispatchers. According to a criminal complaint obtained by The Smoking Gun, Duddles was high on THC when he dialed a non-emergency line at the Waukesha Police Department four times in a span of 37 minutes on January 21, and propositioned both male and female dispatchers.
Boner Candidate #2: I’VE READ 25 BOOKS
Jared Kushner has sparked ridicule after suggesting that he was qualified to steer the Middle East peace process because he had read 25 books on the subject. Kushner made the boast in an interview with Sky News Arabia in which he also declared he had ‘spoken to every leader in the region’. Viewers quickly responded by applying Kushner’s logic to suggest that they could fly a plane or play in the NBA if they had read enough about it. The president’s son-in-law is the principal architect of the Israel-Palestine peace proposal which Donald Trump unveiled on Tuesday. Israel has hailed the proposal but the Palestinians have fiercely rejected the plan – prompting Kushner to remark that they ‘always screw everything up’.
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