Boners

Boner Candidates January 21, 2016

Boner Candidate #1: SARAH PALIN SAYS OF HER SON’S DOMESTIC VIOLENCE CHARGE…”THANKS OBAMA!”

ormer Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin on Wednesday linked her son’s domestic violence arrest to President Barack Obama’s treatment of veterans. Track Palin, a 26-year-old Iraq veteran, was arrested in Wasilla on Tuesday on domestic violence and weapons charges in an incident involving a woman, according to Gawker. Palin decided to address what she called “the elephant in the room” during a campaign rally in Tulsa, Oklahoma, before she introduced Donald Trump, whom she endorsed Tuesday. “My son, like so many others, they come back a bit different. They come back hardened, they come back wondering if there’s that respect for what it is their fellow soldiers and airmen and every other member of the military have so sacrificially given to this country,” Palin said, adding that she can “relate with other families who can feel these ramifications of PTSD and some of the woundedness our soldiers do return with.” Palin went on to criticize the Obama administration’s treatment of veterans, implying that the president had something to do with her son’s situation.

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Boner Candidate #2: YOU TOUCH MY TRUCK?

Authorities in central Florida say a man died after a dispute over whether he touched another man’s pickup truck. Brevard County Sheriff’s spokesman Maj. Tod Goodyear tells the Orlando Sentinel that 67-year-old German Heredia was walking with his granddaughters and their dogs Jan. 5 when Warren Buchanan walked up and accused Heredia of touching his truck. The two men began arguing. Goodyear says 51-year-old Buchanan then hit Heredia’s face, knocking him to the ground and causing him to hit his head. Heredia was taken to a hospital, where he died. The Brevard County Medical Examiner’s Office ruled the death a homicide caused by trauma to the head. Buchanan was arrested Friday and faces a manslaughter charged in connection with Heredia’s death. It isn’t clear if he has an attorney.

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Boner Candidate #3: SORRY IF I OFFENDED. THE GIRLS, EVEN THE SLUTTY ONE.

A Republican lawmaker in Washington state startled a group of teen visitors by asking which ones were virgins and even suggesting one was not, according to the Seattle Times. The high school students had met with state Rep. Mary Dye to advocate for expanded insurance coverage for birth control as part of Planned Parenthood’s Teen Lobbying Day when she asked the highly intrusive question. “After she made the statement about virginity, all of my teens looked at me,” Rachel Todd, a Planned Parenthood worker accompanying the kids, told the Seattle Times. “And I said, ‘You don’t have to answer that. You don’t have to answer that.’” Dye then spoke about the importance of making good choices, but it was the virginity question that stood out.  One of the students told the paper the comments were “insane,” a sentiment many on social media agreed with.

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