Life

Jon Smith Loves Bad Movies: SHORT CIRCUIT 2

No no, not the ORIGINAL Short Circuit..

For some reason, I liked the sequel better.  Maybe it was just my age group.  Short Circuit came out when I was in 2nd or 3rd grade, which means I was able to deliver the classic insult “Your mama was a snowblower!” in Mrs. Gee’s Homeroom and become one of Bennion Elementary’s most wanted offenders.

But THIS Short Circuit came out in ’88..  Which means I was able to catch it at the Valley Fair Dollar Movie.  WITHOUT PARENT SUPERVISION Or at least part of it..  My pal Justin and I left the movie to go to the Keyhole, and buy some GI Joe’s at Kay-Bee toys.  Great day until we got busted by my Dad.  Man, he was pissed.

 

 

So lets see how much of this movie I can review for you just on memory, and the trailer for our latest edition of JON LOVES TERRIBLE MOVIES!

Short Circuit 2 picks up where the first movie left off.  With Stephanie and Crosby (Ally Sheedy, and THA GUTE) hiding out in Montana or something.  But we never learned what happened to super scientist and classic racial stereotype Ben Javari!  He’s in NYC making tiny toy versions of the original #5 robut featured in the first film.  Javeri has fallen on hard times and lives in the back of a Nova Robotics van, and would have to take jobs as the bad guy in HACKERS.  (mental note, review Hackers..)

That’s when he meets up with the dude from Lavern and Shirly who wants to make some serious “dough” and loves his silk shirt more than life itself.  How?  Well they’re going to mass produce the toy robuts and sell them to a department store.  Big bucks man.  For real.  But how?  Enter #5!  Or rather the new version now known as “Johnny 5”.  He’s no longer a harbinger of lazer death, no no.  He’s now a rolling green peace advocate, and Nike billboard

 

Johnny 5 is lonely in the city though, and FRED is an asshole who tries to sell Johnny 5.  Oh man, this does not go well.  But at the same time, an old dude come across our new robut pal, and dupes him into breaking in to a bank vault, along the way hilarity ensues, Johnny gets arrested, and even joins a rough and tough NYC street gang called LOS LOCOS!

Eventually, the jig is up and and Johnny 5 needs to be taken out.  So he’s savagely beaten by your classic 80’s henchmen.  Only to swing in and save the day..   I guess.  I’m not really sure what the point was there, but the old dude was on a boat, and the robut was like “OH NOWAY BOZO”..

Yeah.  Great show man.  You should totally watch it.

 


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